Tia Ramelan stood in the middle of her ruined living room.
Confetti. Slime stains.A half-melted demon piñata.A haunted folding chair twitching suspiciously in the corner.
"This is fine," Tia muttered, sipping cold coffee.
Mr. Floofers knocked over a vase in silent agreement.
Ba'zaroth flopped onto the couch — it groaned under his weight — and lazily zapped away a floating party hat with a flick of his tail.
Lady Eugenia floated in, checking a clipboard.
"Well, darling, you've survived one GhostCon, one demon siege, and six spontaneous hauntings this week alone!"
Tia slammed her coffee down.
"I am calling a Day of Normalcy."
Everyone stared at her.
Even the furniture.
"A what now?" Ba'zaroth drawled.
"A Day of Normalcy!" Tia declared, arms flailing. "One day.Twenty-four hours.NO ghosts.NO magic.NO poltergeist karaoke."
Bingo dive-bombed her head screaming, "BORINGGGGG."
Lady Eugenia clapped politely."Splendid idea! Shall I schedule it between 'Wailing Wednesday' and 'Cursed Crafts Thursday'?"
"NO," Tia snapped. "Starting NOW."
She made rules:
No floating.
No haunting.
No blood oaths.
No demon summoning, possession, curses, or mild sacrifices.
Absolutely no resurrecting ancient evils before brunch.
Ba'zaroth signed the contract with a fake halo floating over his horns.
Ellis handed out laminated badges:"I AM NORMAL TODAY."
Mr. Floofers was reluctantly fitted with a tiny normal hat.
DJ Deadbeat sulked, turning off the haunted subwoofers.
The whole house fell into an awkward, unnatural silence.
9:00 AM: Tia attempts to clean.
She attacked the living room with a mop and sheer rage.
The slime fought back.
She won (barely).
Mr. Floofers rode the mop like a tiny furry cowboy.
Victory was hers.
10:00 AM: Grocery run.
Tia needed supplies.
She left strict instructions:
"STAY NORMAL OR ELSE."
At the market, she grabbed bread, eggs, and very non-haunted cereal.
It was peaceful.
Calm.
Ordinary.
Too ordinary.
Tia kept looking over her shoulder, half-expecting a zombie stampede.
Instead, an old lady handed her a coupon for mayonnaise.
Was this what civilian life felt like??
11:30 AM: Return home.
Tia pulled into the driveway.
And immediately saw:
Ba'zaroth mowing the lawn with literal fire magic.
Ellis trying to herd a flock of semi-visible sheep ghosts into the backyard.
Lady Eugenia leading a "normal" tea party, except the guests were three floating skulls and a haunted accordion.
Tia slammed her forehead into the steering wheel.
12:00 PM: Intervention.
Tia gathered them all.
"THIS. IS. NOT. NORMAL."
Ba'zaroth shrugged. "This is normal... for us."
Lady Eugenia poured her a cup of phantom tea.
Ellis offered her a ghost scone (it disintegrated instantly).
Mr. Floofers rolled in a cursed beach ball.
DJ Deadbeat tried to hide a mini rave setup behind a potted plant.
Tia stared at them.
Her weird, annoying, slightly cursed roommates.
Her friends.
Her family, sort of.
God help her.
Tia sat down, cradled the cup of ghost tea, and sighed.
"Fine. Maybe a tiny bit of weird is okay."
Ba'zaroth smirked."Atta girl."
Lady Eugenia raised her teacup."To functional dysfunction!"
They all cheered.
Even Bingo screamed "TO CHAOS!" from the chandelier.
1:00 PM: Attempt at Normal Lunch.
Tia made sandwiches.
Ba'zaroth burned his toast by glaring at it.
Lady Eugenia levitated her plate for "extra elegance."
Ellis accidentally ate a sandwich possessed by a minor demon named Kevin.
(It gave him heartburn and a craving for tires.)
Mr. Floofers licked mayonnaise off the walls.
DJ Deadbeat played "Smooth Jazz for Souls" at ear-splitting volume.
It was... almost a normal lunch.
Almost.
3:00 PM: "Quiet Time."
Tia curled up with a book.
A non-haunted book.
Ba'zaroth napped upside-down on the couch like a bat.
Lady Eugenia floated through a crossword puzzle.
Ellis tinkered with a new anti-ghost trap (which immediately trapped his own shoe).
DJ Deadbeat polished his turntables lovingly.
Mr. Floofers snored like a tiny motorcycle.
For a few minutes...
Just a few...
Everything was peaceful.
Tia smiled into her cup of cocoa.
4:00 PM: Minor Apocalypse.
The Soulstone, which they'd all forgotten about for two seconds, began to hum ominously.
Lights flickered.
The air grew cold.
A crack formed in the basement floor.
Tia immediately screamed, "NO. I AM STILL ON MY DAY OFF."
She stomped down to the basement in fluffy slippers.
The Soulstone pulsed.
A deep, ancient voice whispered:"Mortal... unleash me..."
Tia threw a dirty laundry basket over it.
"NO. SHUT UP."
She duct-taped the basket to the floor.
"STAY."
The voice whimpered, "But I have cookies..."
Tia kicked it lightly.
The basement went silent.
5:00 PM: Nap Attempt #2.
Tia faceplanted into her bed.
Snoring almost instantly.
Outside her door, Ba'zaroth taped a sign:"Mortal Queen of Chaos – Do Not Disturb (Unless World Ends)."
Mr. Floofers stood guard, wearing a tiny paper crown.
Lady Eugenia floated by, humming a lullaby.
Ellis slipped a "normal award" certificate under her door.
DJ Deadbeat dimmed the haunted disco lights.
The ghosts tiptoed around the house, their chaos surprisingly... muted.
For once.
6:00 PM: Sunset at Ramelan House.
Tia woke up to the soft golden light flooding her room.
She stretched.
She yawned.
She listened.
No explosions.
No slime geysers.
No spectral bingo tournaments.
Just...
Quiet.
Peace.
Maybe, just maybe, normal wasn't a place.
Maybe it was a feeling.
And maybe — just maybe — Ramelan House was her normal now.
Insanity, slime, and all.