*
Elementary school was different, the single building would be housing roughly 3 times the population of the kindergarten's. Her class was now much larger, rather than 15, there was now around 35 students in every class.
"Sariel..." (Cherry)
"Sariel...?" (Lenna)
... How cruel was fate? On her first day of elementary school, the relief of being freed from her previous class was crushed. That feeling of her heart sinking that she felt 2 years ago... It came back. Albeit it wasn't as awful as last time.
"... You, did you have business with her?" (?)
Another girl stepped inbetween them, her small back looked so valiant. But Sariel refrained from immediately attaching her feelings to the unknown girl, when she trusted Cherry back then...
Lenna's puzzled expression and knitted brows returned to a boring frown, strangely enough nothing came out of that chance meeting. Why would there be? They've been in the same class for the past 2 years, meeting each other once more wouldn't change anything.
"No... That was nothing. Let's go, cherry." (Lenna)
They must have entered from different entrances of the school building as they headed in opposite directions of the corridor to reach their classes. If this continued, meeting them in this hallway might be a reoccurring coincidence. Sariel should at least prepare herself... It'll be the same as last time... They'll ignore each other, and nothing will change...
"It looks like she has business with you though." (Erida)
She was one of Sariel's new classmates, they were heading in the same direction when Erida was caught in the middle of that awkward atmosphere. Sariel screamed in her heart, cursing Erida for making things seemed worse. Yet, she couldn't quite get her voice out, doubt grew within her heart. Is this what she wanted? To bear this burden in her heart everyday?
"What is it?" (Lenna)
She stared at the ground for a few seconds, before craning her head to face Cherry with a resolute look. Her fingers subconsciously gripped at the front of her skirt tightly, her knuckles whitened from her forceful she was pressing onto the fabric.
"Cherry... You knew what happened... Why?" (Sariel)
"... It's because you were weak. No one picked on you after that... I have... No more words to offer you." (Cherry)
"... Alright." (Sariel)
The weight on her heart has never left, though it was a little alleviated. Was this enough? She didn't know, what should she do? She turned around and walked towards her close.
"I'm Erida by the way, was that okay?" (Erida)
She was amicable, and strangely easy to talk to. Simply hearing her voice gave Sariel enough confidence to finally get her voice out and relax.
"I'm Sariel... I don't know, but I'm fine." (Sariel)
Erida observes her expression from behind, caught in awe by her firm determination. She was a little different from before, perhaps the few words she exchanged with Cherry really helped. Her emotions were a little more firm now, compared to her previous jittery disposition that seemed like it would collapse like cards at any moment. A strange emotion took place in Erida's heart, one she wasn't quite acquainted with.
Sariel reached into class, chose a seat and had a successful introduction. She didn't stand out in anyway, but that in itself was something she deemed to be worth celebrating. Everyone will now treat her normally, right? Within the next few weeks, her doubt manifested in her behaviour, uncertainty remained in her heart.
As she passes through each day, she celebrates to herself for getting to the end of the day. Her chance meetings with those 2 became less awkward as she gradually grew less conscious of them. What helped was that they weren't always together anymore, to the point that she hasn't seen the both of them at once ever since that day.
"How was it today?" (Erida)
She regularly keeps checking in with Sariel, a regular but rare moment that Sariel finds relief in. Her presence alone restores Sariel's composure, causing her worries to fly away for a transient moment.
" I'm doing fine. Nobody bothers me here, everyone is quite friendly." (Sariel)
At least no one shares the same attitude of blatant avoidance towards her, like her previous classmates. Even if they weren't particularly friendly either, things remained barely amicable and polite in her interactions. Only Erida seemed to get close to her, sharing her experiences like reciting bedtime stories. Erida usually hand out with a group of 3 others, it was only during occasional afternoons like this, when she would reach out to Sariel after school. On Sariel's end, she didn't have the drive to get close to others.
Her experience with Cherry... Her misplaced trust had caused her great anguish. She didn't want such a thing to happen again, and... She was also afraid that she would do what Cherry did and cause someone else to suffer.
"Grrr!! If you wanted to hang out with her so much, why don't you just stick with her! It's your fault for constantly putting off our plans!" (Lilfa)
"But...!" (Erida)
One day during lunch, she happened to overhear their squabble. Erida's warmth hung over her head like damocle's sword. Sariel walked towards the exit with her head hung, it was near where they all stood and argued at. Though Erida was strangely quiet. Sariel looked up to see their expectant gazes on her, the same weight grasped at her heart and silenced her. Just like Erida, no words would come out. She simply ran.
She ran and ran, the familiar floor plan filled her vision. Her legs never stopped until her lack of breath caught up to her, she wheezed as she climbed the stairs with a limp. Pushing open the door to the roof, there were a few other groups of students there eating their lunch. She caught their unnatural attention, discretely she attempted to move away into her usual corner before she sat down.
After she walked a few steps, they stopped caring and went back to their own affairs. She was sweatier and more fatigued than usual, but it wasn't much of a source of concern for strangers.
This... This was how things are supposed to be... She'll lose Erida now, but it's fine. Erida will tell everyone on her and her experiences with her kindergarten classmates, she will be isolated once more... But then... She would no longer need to walk on eggshells anymore. Politeness, amicability, to hell with all that. It was all a burden too heavy for her to bear. It was way easier to come back to this lifestyle.
After some time lunch was about to be over, lunch was staggered over 3 different time periods, so only 2 years worth of students would be using the cafeteria. The rooftop had students from other years, and they've all begun to head back on their own.
A emptiness takes hold over her mind. It could never be filled, and even if it did, it would only bring pain.