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HOW I died like an IDIOT and BECAME IMMORTAL

Kalahan_L
Synopsis: Dying at 21 because of a banana? Yep, that’s how this ridiculous story begins. Alan, an incredibly average guy (maybe too average), meets his untimely end in a way so pathetic it wouldn't even make the back page of a local newspaper. But instead of staying dead, he wakes up in a bizarre new world filled with elves, demons, beastkin... and absurdly muscular orcs. But here's the catch: he didn’t get any overpowered ability. No mountain-shattering strength, no dragon summoning spells. Just one thing—immortality. Cool? Maybe. Annoying? Absolutely. Now, thrown into a world of chaotic quests, strangely alluring girls with animal features, and enemies who seem allergic to logic, Alan embarks on a totally unheroic journey. Not to save the world, but maybe just to find a comfy bed where no one tosses him out the window every morning. A fantasy comedy with a dash of madness... just like its immortal idiot of a protagonist. Alan Just a regular guy with zero ambition, zero talent, and somehow... zero mortality. Alan never trained with a sword, never read ancient grimoires, and definitely never dreamed of saving the world. He’s the kind of person who’d trip over his own feet and blame the floor. After dying from a banana peel incident (yes, really), he wakes up in a fantasy world where magic is real, monsters are everywhere, and women have tails, ears, and serious attitude problems. His only ability? Regeneration so broken, he literally can’t die. His goal? Unclear. His strategy? Mostly screaming, running, and pretending he knows what he’s doing. He’s not a hero. He’s not a villain. He’s just... Alan. And somehow, that’s enough to break every rule in this messed-up world.
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The Next General

"Have you heard of him?" A small boy tugged at a woman's skirt, his tiny finger pointing at the large portrait of a man clad in a minister’s robe. "Shhh! Don’t say its name!" The woman hushed him, glancing around anxiously. She knew the boy was only curious about the drawing, yet the inscription beside it spoke of someone else entirely. Still, the credit had been given to the man in the portrait. "Why?" "We just... don’t say it." "Are you talking about The Next General?" A man dressed as a scholar interjected, inserting himself into the conversation. "Everyone is talking about it. After a hundred years, it has returned. I can't decide whether that fills me with hope or dread." His words were meant to impress, to showcase his knowledge, but the woman only tightened her grip on the boy, scooped him up, and hurried away like a hunted animal sensing danger. The scholar let out a single sharp laugh. "A chaotic rhythm… and marvellously extraordinary times are upon us," he murmured, before turning and walking away. --- Disclaimer This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and events are either the product of the author's imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to real events is purely coincidental. The views and opinions expressed by the characters do not necessarily reflect those of the author. This book contains content that may not be suitable for all audiences. Reader discretion is advised. ------- Author-Sama is here with another one, been planning this for quite a while but laziness and procrastination keeps holding me down but now I am free. Here is another exciting historical novel, please enjoy.
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