We are the victims of our own emotions
I always hated reality, I have always unknowingly rejected the notion of understanding it, the person that I have become
Its painful
It hurts
For the past few years I have entrapped myself in a never ending cycle, sleep, eat, play video games, workout and the cycle repeats itself overagain.
Again and again and again
Video games eventually became my life, it became my happiness
However even your most favorite dish becomes bland if you were to eat it every single day of your life.
And at some point video games no longer became happy
The happy drug i used to take, overtime became a source of stress and unhappiness, the same thrill i got from the drug, the praise, the winstreak, the kill, became bland.
It was then the walls of the world I have locked myself in shattered, it was then I was forced to look outside of the device that choose to imprison myself in.
The world is....beautiful
The simple color and contrast of my desk, the details on the floor, the wall, windows and the outside, became beautiful....
As my mind wandered of how beautiful the real world looked, as color came back to my sights, I was forced to look
I was forced to look at the kind person I have become
A video game addict,
A person who rejected every person in his life
A person who wishes to make a connection, a spark but rejects it under the disguise of "I am an introvert"
Its painful to admit that you yourself are the cause of your unhappiness,
or that your not as great as you perceive yourself to be.