I woke up to the steady beeping of the monitors and the soft gray light slipping through the blinds.
For a moment, I didn't remember where I was. Then I felt the weight of Lucas's hand in mine, warm and solid, and it all came rushing back, the fight, the hospital, the ache in my chest that had nothing to do with injuries.
He was still asleep beside me, his breathing even, his lips slightly parted. He looked softer like he'd finally let his guard down.
I stayed still, just watching him. From the start of his hospital visit until now, it felt like something cracked open between us, something real and raw. But the morning brought questions, ones I wasn't sure how to answer. What were we now? What happened next?
The door opened softly, and I turned my head to see a nurse step in. She smiled when she saw us but said nothing. Just checked the IV line and scribbled something on her chart before leaving again.
Lucas stirred a little at the noise, his eyes blinking open slowly.
"Hey," he croaked, his voice raspy with sleep.
"Hey," I whispered back, brushing hair out of my face. "You okay?"
He nodded, wincing slightly. "Been better. But… not bad."
"I didn't think you'd still be here, it's been two days. Aren't your parents worried" he said quietly, his eyes searching mine.
"I didn't want to leave."
He looked at me like he wasn't sure if he should believe it. Like he still hadn't quite figured out why I was still here. Honestly? I wasn't sure either. All I knew was that when I thought I might lose him… something in me broke.
"Earlier" I said. My voice was small. "You scared me,"
Lucas blinked slowly. "I'm sorry."
"I know you were trying to protect me," I said, reaching for his hand again. "But it wasn't just that. I was scared because I realized… I didn't know what I'd do if you weren't okay."
His eyes met mine, and something in his expression shifted. He wasn't smiling, not exactly, but there was something softer there.
"I kept thinking about you while they were patching me up," he said. "Not my parents. Not school. Just you."
I exhaled slowly, letting the words settle in my chest.
"This thing between us," I said, "I don't know what it is yet. But it's not nothing."
"No," he said. "Definitely not nothing."
A knock at the door pulled our attention away. A doctor stepped in, glancing at the chart. "Good news," He said. "If everything looks stable later today, we might send you home tomorrow."
Lucas nodded slowly, clearly still processing. I felt the shift, the bubble around us starting to thin. The real world was inching back in.
After the doctor left, I helped Lucas sit up a little straighter, fluffing the pillow behind him. He grimaced but let me.
"I guess this is where everything goes back to normal," he said, not looking at me.
"Maybe," I replied. "But I don't think we can pretend that nothing happened that night."
He looked over at me then, his eyes serious. "I don't want this to be just hospital-room feelings. I don't want to forget."
"You won't," I said. "Neither will I."
He reached for my hand again, slower this time, more certain. I let our fingers tangle together.
We didn't need to figure everything out right now.
A few hours later
The morning had come and gone, the quiet in the hospital room filled with more questions than answers. The sounds of nurses coming in and out, the clinking of machines, the occasional cough from down the hall, everything felt strangely muffled, like I was still in the midst of some dream, still holding on to the moment that had happened between Lucas and me.
But now, the reality of it was hitting. Lucas was going home.
He was sitting up in his bed, wearing a plain hospital gown, his messy hair falling over his forehead as he glanced down at the chart the doctor had handed him. He looked tired, but there was something in his eyes that made me feel like maybe he wasn't as fragile as he appeared.
The nurse had just finished taking his vitals, and she gave him a cheerful smile.
"You're free to go, Mr. West," she said, her voice bright. "Just make sure to take it easy for the next few days. Don't overexert yourself, and make sure to contact your doctor if anything feels off."
Lucas nodded absently, still processing the idea of leaving. The doctor had warned him not to push himself too hard, to take it slow.
"Thanks," he muttered, his voice still a little rough.
She turned to leave, giving me a nod as she went. I stayed where I was, on the chair beside Lucas's bed, watching Lucas carefully as he adjusted the covers on his bed, looking like he wasn't quite sure what to do next.
"So…" I started, clearing my throat, "Are you ready to go home?"
He met my gaze, and for a brief second, I saw the uncertainty in his eyes. Maybe he was just as unsure as I was about what came next.
"I guess," he said slowly. "I mean, I've been here for a few days, and I'm tired of staring at these walls." He grimaced, shifting his weight slightly. "But it feels… weird, you know? Like I'm not ready to just walk out and pretend everything's normal."
I could understand that. He'd been through something heavy.
I moved closer to him, my steps light. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to help him get dressed, or if he was ready to do it on his own, but I didn't want to push him.
"You don't have to pretend anything," I said softly, sitting on the edge of his bed. "Nothing's really normal, but we don't have to figure it all out today."
Lucas chuckled, but it wasn't the usual carefree laugh. It was more… thoughtful. "That's probably for the best," he said.
He stood up, his legs a little unsteady beneath him, but he didn't lean on me as I expected him to. He straightened his shoulders and gave me a wry smile.
"I'll be okay," he said. "Just… not today. Maybe not tomorrow either."
I smiled back, my heart swelling a little at how vulnerable he was allowing himself to be in front of me. "We'll take it one step at a time."
After getting his things together, we made our way to the exit. The hospital room had felt like a safe cocoon, keeping us isolated from the world outside, but now, as we stepped through the double doors and into the bright daylight, reality hit hard.
There was no clear line between where the hospital world ended and the outside world began. Things were still up in the air, our relationship, his recovery, the dynamics with our friends.
But one thing was for sure.
I wasn't letting go.