A few months earlier.
The sea shimmered under a clear blue sky, gently rocking a small wooden fishing boat that looked like it had been slapped together by a half-blind carpenter and an optimistic drunk. Lying sprawled in the middle was a very peaceful Aithur Zian—shirt open, hat tipped over his face, snoring softly.
His fishing rod was secured to the side, line dangling uselessly in the water.
"Zzzznkk… fish stew… fried crab… three silver per—"
SNAP!
The rod jerked forward with the force of a divine slap. The boat tilted sharply.
"GAH—MOTHER OF SPINES!" Aithur flailed upright, grabbing the rod with both hands before it could drag him into the depths. "WHO THE HELL IS ON THE OTHER END, A WHALE WITH AN ATTITUDE?!"
His feet skidded across the soaked deck. He slammed into the mast, bounced off it, and clutched the rod again as it bent into a question mark.
"Okay, okay, easy now," he muttered, gritting his teeth. "You're just a big, angry fish with unresolved trauma, and I'm just a guy trying to eat. We don't have to fight!"
The fish disagreed.
With a violent yank, it lifted the entire back end of the boat. Aithur screamed.
"I TAKE IT BACK, YOU'RE A DAMN SEA DEMON!"
The line wrapped around his waist. "No no no no—"
WHOOSH! He was yanked straight off his feet and slammed face-first into the deck again.
By some miracle, he held on.
"This is it," he gasped. "This is how I die. Dragged into the ocean by a fish that hates taxes."
Above, in the skies.
Clouds parted around a golden floating temple—an ethereal structure atop a massive stone lotus, glowing with Qi.
Inside, disciples in blue robes meditated around a sacred pedestal. At its center floated a Sunheart Lily, its petals gleaming gold with warmth and divine energy.
Suddenly—
BOOM!
The protective barrier shattered in a burst of black lightning.
A masked man in black robes darted from the smoke, clutching the Sunheart Lily. His cloak fluttered as he soared through the temple's window.
"HE'S TAKING THE LILY!" someone screamed.
"AFTER HIM!"
Back on the ocean.
Aithur had finally gotten the fish's head out of the water. It thrashed violently, tail smacking him like it had a vendetta.
He clung to the rod with both arms and legs.
"If I let go now, I've wasted five hours, three worms, and two vertebrae!"
The fish flailed again.
WHACK! It slapped him upside the head with its tail.
"OW—OKAY. THAT'S IT. I'M COOKING YOU ALIVE."
Then, out of nowhere—
FWHOOSH!
A black blur zipped across the sky overhead, trailing dark mist. Behind it, three cultivators streaked past, swords glowing, robes flapping like angry curtains.
Aithur blinked, mouth agape. "...Is that man flying with a… plant?"
The lead cultivator shouted, "RETURN THE SUNHEART LILY, SHADOW FIEND!"
Aithur blinked again. "Shadow fiend? Are we doing stage names now?"
The second cultivator shouted, "You'll pay for the Red Petal Massacre!"
"...Oookay, definitely not my business."
He turned to paddle in the opposite direction—only for a blast of Qi to strike the water nearby. His boat rocked violently.
"HEY! I'M UNARMED! AND UNINTERESTED!"
Another energy slash ripped overhead. One of the cultivators narrowly missed decapitating his oar.
"EXCUSE ME! DO I LOOK LIKE A MAGIC CACTUS TO YOU?!"
The fish gave one final wriggle and died. Aithur collapsed beside it, wheezing.
"I caught you. I caught you, you son of a mackerel. And now the sky's trying to murder me!"
Above him, the black-robed thief twisted in midair and fired a bolt of dark energy back at his pursuers. One cultivator spun aside mid-flight.
The elder cultivator raised his sword, eyes glowing.
"Azure Wave Slash—Third Form!"
Aithur blinked up from his half-sunken boat.
"Wait—third form? What were the first two?!"
Then—
SSHHHHHHHHHHHLAAAAAAASH!
The sky split open in a flash of blue energy. The black-robed thief was struck directly in the chest. He howled, releasing the golden plant as his body spiraled downward.
Aithur, meanwhile, watched the beam approach the sea and calmly said:
"Oh no."
BOOOOM!
A shockwave flattened the waves. Aithur's boat was blasted into the air like a skipping stone. It hit the shore with a crash, flipped upside down, and buried him beneath broken wood and flopping fish.
Then came the rain.
Of seafood.
WHUMP! WHUMP! WHAP!
Dozens of fish rained from the heavens—trout, snapper, squid, one very angry crab—all landing on and around Aithur.
Buried under the wreckage, Aithur's muffled voice groaned, "This is karma, isn't it? For stealing that one apple when I was eight."
The cultivators descended onto the beach. One knelt beside the thief's limp body, extracting a dark, corrupted core from his chest.
"This much darkness... he's beyond saving."
"Still," the elder said. "The Council will want the core. It might reveal who sent him."
Another disciple waded into the shallows and retrieved the Sunheart Lily, surprisingly unharmed.
"The relic is safe," he said, breathing a sigh of relief.
Behind them, the mountain of fallen fish steamed in the sun.
"…Did we break the ecosystem?" one of the younger cultivators asked.
"Don't think about it," the elder replied. "Let's report back."
The three of them shot back into the sky, their swords slicing silently through the clouds.
Silence.
Then: plop.
A sardine slid off a piece of driftwood.
Aithur sat up from under the debris, hair full of kelp, a crab latched to his earlobe, and a trout flopped dramatically across his lap.
He stared blankly into the horizon, dead-eyed.
"…I just wanted dinner," he croaked.
The crab snapped at his ear again.
"THAT'S IT. I'M MOVING INLAND. I'LL HUNT SQUIRRELS. I'LL MILK GOATS. I'LL MARRY A CABBAGE FARMER AND NEVER LOOK AT WATER AGAIN."
A seagull landed beside him and took a bite out of his dead fish.
"…I hate this world."