Two and fro, one girl's beauty to another girl's insatiable lust
Or was it both that shared the same?
Various mugs full of coffee stood on the lounge table as we all struggled to make ourselves awake. Everyone was just as jaded as the rest as we sat around in a circle within Rose's residence. Apparently her parents were out on some business trip, leaving her the keys to the house, hence why she thought it best for us all to situate in her home.
…But this wasn't lining up with my memory…
Clapping her hands as she stood up with energy, her pose and stature that of an idol as she posed while doing so.
"So! Now that we're all awake and ready for the day, how about we-"
"Rose, I love you. But please shut it for now"
Rebecca, cutting her off. Holding her hand up with a glass full of whiskey in the other. 'Hair of the dog' in full effect for her.
"... Wow Becca. Way to ruin my mood ya meanie!"
"Well at least she's saying the obvious"
Arun, laying in a sort of coffin position on the dark red sofa behind everyone else. Staring straight up at the roof, being deathly still, like a vampire waiting to have an excuse to be let loose, wearing nothing but his grey sweatpants.
"...Sorry Rose"
"Always gotta spoil it for everyone huh you two?"
Tye, walking back into the picture, having just come back through the lounge door after stepping outside for a cigarette break. Sitting down on the carpet next to me, rubbing my back as he did, Rose, showing visible frustration as she sat back down in between myself and David.
Her head now resting on his arm as he took a sip from the mug of coffee in his hands, being flustered slightly as she leaned in more.
After what I had just seen from her before, looking at her seamlessly go back to her friendly, cutesy manner shocked me to say the least. From naked and tempting to clothed and friendly in almost an instant.
This girl I thought I'd judged appropriately, now slowly becoming more mysterious in my head.
"Well, at least let me put some music on! My house after all!"
Reaching for her phone, looking at the sound system next to the sizable TV screen behind her to check if it was turned on.
Her face, showing a smile form as I assumed she realized it was indeed online, swiftly turning to her phone to select a song.
'London Calling - The Clash'
"Hah! Much better!"
Her body now more relaxed and free flowing as she slipped in and out of David's grasp, his face smiling ear to ear seeing her in the infectiously heartwarming manner he was probably well versed in.
Struggling to think of anything but questions, no end to this car crash of a brain, having hit a brick wall at full force the moment I opened my eyes.
Her naked body, now slowly taking over my inner vision, yet questions still stuck out like nails, begging to be hammered in, residing on a simple plank of wood or my eventual coffin had yet to be decided.
"Yo, I still got some loud if y'all are keen to step out for a few"
Tye, flashing a ball of tin foil in his hand, my vision could tell exactly what the inside of that ball held, having seen more than a few in my history, the familiar and pungent smell made confirming it even easier.
Thinking my mind could be thoroughly subdued by this sudden prospect, the remnants of last night's questions possibly being answered as well, killing two birds with one stone, I reluctantly raised my hand.
Rebecca raised her hand almost in unison with mine as she looked at me briefly before doing so, as if she already knew my answer, probably darting back at my confused and concerned states of expressions, evident to even the most oblivious of eyes.
Getting up swiftly, Tye gestured for us to follow him as we both stood up, taking a glance at everyone else in the room briefly, as if to ask 'last chance' before we would eventually leave to do our thing.
"...Hey Robin?"
Rose, now showing a somewhat concerned face, looking directly at me, still keeping herself close to David, His face showing an expression close to her's, as I'm sure they were thinking the same thing.
"...Don't get too fucked up this time. We ain't bailing you out if ya do!"
Laughing as she said this, David followed suit in his laughter.
Shit. Was I really that bad last night?
Time to find out I suppose.
Standing outside, a concrete paved backyard surrounded by a moderately sized dark wooden fence. Clothing line pinned to one of the walls of the fence dangling around with the wind as Tye was crafting the subsequent joint we were about to share between the three of us.
"Damn, y'all got a card? Forgot I don't have any on me right now"
"Got some zig zags left inside, I'll go get em"
Rebecca swiftly walked back through the backdoor as me and Tye remained standing, his hands still situated on the blunt rolled, waiting for Rebecca to bring the cardboard needed to finish the product.
Thinking this time would be more than perfect to ask one of the trillions of questions in my head, despite anxiety having made it's fully manifested presence more than known, making it obviously difficult to speak any words at all, much less ask the pressing matters.
So my usual silent demeanor was all I could do for the time being. Tye, being the casual, no stress cool guy he was, simply leaned against the wooden structure of the house behind us, eagerly waiting his chance to fire up the unfinished joint he was holding.
"...What do ya think Michelle's doing these days bro?"
Looking at me with a calm and relaxed composure, all I could do was stare back. Confusion being dulled slightly as I knew the name he was referring to.
But why ask about her now?
She was an old pre-college friend of ours.
Dark skin, blue eyes, long dark hair, personality like a razor blade, cutting sentences down to their bare minimum, focusing on the meat of a subject and less of the filler around it.
Sure she was sharp and sometimes cruel with how she did it, but she had her charm, if anything it wasn't intentional, it was just how she went about it.
She and I never really kept in touch after I started College, much if not all of my friends prior shared the same fate with me, Tye being one of the very few exceptions as he now stood next to me, waiting for my answer.
All I could do was reply to the best of my now dwindling knowledge, soon to be turned to mush once things were said and done here.
"Last I saw her was months ago dude. I think… she's a trainee as a nurse these days"
His face showed that of slight shock but near full admiration.
"Nurse?! Shit, fair enough! Wouldn't have guessed that"
A few seconds passed before Rebecca returned outside. An empty pack of zig zag papers in one hand, pair of small scissors in the other, clearly being ready for any and all drug related situations, handing Tye both as she went to stand next to him.
Cutting a piece of cardboard from the packet, rolling it into a tiny cylinder and pressing it through the paper before sealing it shut like an envelope, licking the seams before twisting the top for good measure. Rebecca, handing him a lighter just after he had completed.
"Wanna do the honours Robin?"
Handing me the blunt as I stood still, slowly going to rea-
HOURS WE FEAR
MINUTES WE THINK
SECONDS WE LIVE
…Thanks brain? For whatever that means. I'll just uhm, go and take a hit now okay?
No response. Green light I suppose.
Taking the lighter and sparking it until the flame was present, bringing it to the now spiralled end of this branch of paper and green leaves.
…
okay fine, you win
don't think I won't be back later
idiot
…
No worries. I was counting on it anyway.
Also who are you calling an idiot dickhead!?
"Robin?"
Tye looked at me with a sense of concern as I looked toward him, blunt in my hand next to gone completely as I stared into nothing but my own being.
"...What did I do last night?"
Rebecca, smirking as I asked this, her mind thoroughly through the walls of the outside world, Tye's face turning somewhat more serious as he went to reply.
"...Sure you wanna know?"
I knew it.
Yet I still needed to know.
"You got pretty fucked up"
Taking the last toke from the blunt we had been passing around. One of us having taken the liberty of adding music to this sudden revelation.
'Electric Relaxation - A Tribe Called Quest'
"I mean, I've seen you like that before.
But dude, you were screaming at me to kill you. Dave had to hold you back from doing anything else"
Laughing slightly as he looked at me.
"We found you outside Lacey's crying your eyes out after we left for a bit. Rose threw the idea around for us to crash at her place cos she was home alone and shit"
Noticing Rebecca, her face looking away from the conversation going on, hand on her face made evident.
Did I lose my chance? Did I fail?
Was I too fucked up to make my next move to…
…Wait. Rose...
…Questions…
…Nothing…
"I tried to help you, honest to God I did"
Rebecca's face now leaned against my shoulder as I stayed standing. Her hand stroked my still blanked out by the answers face. Tye looked on as he had a subtle smile on his.
"... I'm sorry"
All I could say as she kept stroking my head, leaning into me more and more.
"Nah! Don't even sweat it bro! Shit happens"
His embrace encapsulated Rebecca as he went to hug the both of us. Holding us all in stasis as we shared our emotions for a few seconds. Only being intersected by Rebecca eventually.
"Okay, okay Tye. Enough with the sappy shit"
Well, that answered a few of my persistent questions. Guess I should be grateful for that outcome at least. Yet so much had yet to be said. What had happened between me and Rose? How I even got here in one piece? How I even managed to see Rose in her naked beauty? Her breasts. Her luscious lips both above and below. Her beautiful red crimson hair. Her carefree nature in being so exposed with me. Her…
…Oh.
Damn it.
…
"And so what? What if I'm speaking the truth? The more you know the better right?
Arun, now perched on the floor next to us, a bottle of near empty vodka in his grasp as he was in-between David and Tye, slurring every word he spoke.
Myself being somewhat close to the side, dazed as all hell, barely clinging on to the argument at hand as Tye went to rebuttal Arun's statement.
"Broski, seriously, I love you to death. But David don't needa hear that shit right now"
David, face in his hands, on the verge of balling his eyes out. Currently not having the catalyst of Rose being close to him, as her and Rebecca had left outside for a brief conversation.
"Look, David. I really don't like saying this, but still I mea-"
"Then don't say it at all asshole!"
Tye, laughing as he cut off Arun mid sentence. His solid demeanor, now made subtle as he accepted his place in this conversation, ringleader firmly placed his stance upon any grievances that Arun had. His face showed some acceptance yet further fueled for the truth to this reckless group.
'Closure - Chevelle'
Music is now one of the few things keeping me sane here.
"Someone's gotta say it"
"Prick, what do you even think those two are capable of?"
"...Enough"
Taking a swig from the bottle in hand as he looked down to the floor, briefly looking at me before correcting his stance back to sitting position.
"...Rose isn't a slut dude"
Words genuine in nature escaping me as I felt the need to interject this argument, despite having felt two fold the collapsing punch of my internal demon. David's face lit up for a brief moment as I said my piece on the matter, fueling his morale somewhat as he clenched his fist in resolve.
"THAT'S RIGHT ROBIN! SHE'S PURE! SHE'S NOT SOME SLAG FOR THE STREETS TO OWN!"
Arun, sighing as he slowly accepted he was outgunned in this man's sentence. Looking at me again with drunken eyes, catching me off guard slightly this time by his serious tone and nature.
"...For him, keep it together"
Placing his hand on my shoulder as he leaned in further, looking at me with intention, pure in his eyes. Still an enigma was his character to me, yet still, I understood his actions. As vague as they were, he knew something I didn't.
"Down the rabbit hole again huh?"
Laughing as he took his hand off of me. David and Tye looking on in disappointment. Catching me yet again in surprise. Only now seeing this guy branch out from his usual stature of phone in hand, barely keeping a conversation for mere seconds at a time.
"Oh come on! I'm just messing with him!"
"You've got a fucked up way of doing that dude"
'Take me Under - Three Days Grace'
Playlist in the background like a celebration of 'Hot Topic' and bad eyebrow piercings as I did nothing. Sitting there, elated, perplexed in a sort of limbo.
Welcome! Once again, you seem to have caught me at yet another fork in the road of my memory.
Let's try to recap shall we?
…
No?
Yeah I was hoping you'd say that.
Because I still have no idea what the fuck is going on, but hey! Let's try to do this together okay?!
…
No?
Well fuck you we're doing it anyways.
So, here's the deal, there's these two gir-
"You never listen to me do you?"
Kissing me on the lips with passion as he held my face still, mind running on empty, blushing profusely as all I could do was stand there. Releasing me eventually as he gave me a look of serious intent.
"They don't deserve you. Despite how braindead your fucking memory is"
Standing outside now, the wooden structure of Rose's house behind us, clouded daylight above, concrete slabs beneath, his smooth hands touching my body with fever as we stared at each other, sheer intimacy from his eyes made certain as he held me steady against the wall, the stench of alcohol drenched our smell.
"You fucked her didn't you?"
Placing his hand on my crotch as I couldn't do much of anything but wince in confusion and slight pleasure, not truly knowing his intentions, I had to respond appropriately.
"...Y…You know I was drunk right? Arun please, I… I didn't mean to-"
Leaning his hand further into my jeans as he slipped through my underwear, grabbing it with no hesitation, holding his other hand over my mouth to contain the noises from my now fearful and confused mind, as faded as it was, I still had no idea why we were both here, why he was doing this.
Maybe it was that promise he had mentioned last night before my supposed breakdown, or maybe he had something on me being so close to Rose, who I assumed he was referring to when he said 'her'.
"You're mine. Don't forget that. Mine"
Keeping his hold firm on my crotch as he stared into my eyes with a sharp focus, mind darting back and forth, making my vision dizzy with each movement, the effects of the blunt I had shared beforehand keeping its debuffs strong on my reality at hand.
"I'll let you carry on for now. But the next time you touch pussy, I'm fucking you senseless. You owe me that much, kitten"
Hand now reaching behind me, grasp firm on my butt as he kissed my neck.
"Try to remember that"
Remember?
…
'Ain't it Fun - Paramore'
"Fucking idiot goes off and tries to punch the bouncer, guess how that shit went"
Laughter from all ensued as Rebecca told her story, going on about how an old friend of hers tried and eventually failed to get into a nightclub.
The one time I missed my anxious mind, now gone completely, abandoning me for all intents and purposes, hollowed memory slowly renders itself unknown.
All I could do was blankly think toward desperate thoughts, none showing any signs of answering.
'Try to remember'
My mind, hazed by the full bright effect of a once again relapsed night turned morning, whatever direction it wanted being the path I'd take, not a question in my head being called quiet, sensing nothing but subtle staple words in conversations and the soothing music flowing through my mind, any and all genres welcomed me with a full embrace as I tried to keep my stature with everybody else still in the building.
Arun had left a few minutes ago, citing his recent job application to a new business firm wanting a higher form of security software, his interview being tomorrow, hence why he needed to leave early, everyone else here were still in full attention to the newly formed party at hand.
Rose, having her attention focused on Tye, talking away about their usual ramblings from what I'd learned and some other inside information I had yet to know but couldn't exactly pay attention to due to the fixation that the recently inhaled ganja had on my brain, dulling it further, making love to the alcohol flowing through my system like long lost estranged partners.
Oh you thought I wasn't drinking as well?
THEY DID DUMBASS
Yeah they probably assumed that much anyway.
"...Hey, Robin! I wanna show you somethin!"
Rose turned her attention away from Tye and onto me suddenly as I regained my train of thought, looking at her sweet gaze on mine as she smiled ear to ear, my smile being less subtle than hers but regardless having been forced to show one due to her cute demeanor that I was slowly starting to love fiercely. A love that felt anything but foreign to me.
"What is it dude?"
Swiftly standing up from the carpet between us and approaching me with a giddy step to her pace, grabbing my hand and hurrying me up to her face, still smiling profusely as my eyes caught her before quickly being dragged away from the rest of the group, catching a quick gaze at Rebecca before we left through the doorway, her facial expressions seeming somewhat disappointed yet a minor sense of calmness I could sense.
Moving to a dark grey closed door within the halls of her home, situated just across from the single bathroom across from it, her face was still brimming with excitement as she quickly went to open the door, swinging open with force as the contents of the room were now made bare.
A relatively small room, but one that took me completely by surprise, starting to feel that same excitement that Rose was showing me flowing through my mind as I stood outside taking it all in.
"So? Whatcha think?"
It was a room full of musical instruments.
Guitars, keyboards and everything else a standalone musician would need to make his most ambitious dreams come alive.
A big dark desk in one corner of the room holding a state of the art MacBook laptop with white studio speakers flanking each side, a variety of recording equipment surrounding the remaining desk space.
Black styrofoam padding on all four walls of the room, LED lights fluorescent and full of color flushing the light inside.
It was, to say the least, impressively
capable.
But one thing caught my eye the most, taking up a big chunk of the room's available space, recognizing it almost immediately, even in my elated state of mind.
Something I had drooled over in the past, something I thought that would never have graced my eyes in a situation like this.
…There's… There's no way right?
…Jesus Christ it is…
"...Is…IS THAT A TD716?!"
My face, gawking at how this exquisite piece of engineering could possibly be within my reach. Roland's flagship electronic drum kit, 'Roland TD716'.
"Hehe yup! I knew you'd love that first! I was a bit iffy with showing ya at first, but like, you- uhm, I heard you're a drummer right? So you'll be cool with it!"
'STICKS, NOW, PLEASE ROSE!'
Ahem, composure Robin.
Any and all questions and problems ran right out of the window as I stood still seeing this absolute pinnacle of electronic excellence.
Being easily worth over $16,000 on a bad day.
"...You think I could, uhm…"
"No"
Throwing her face in front of mine, blocking my tunnel vision completely as I suddenly snapped my eyes toward her, expression still being that of a giddy school girl, a smile brimming with excitement and joy resonating firmly.
"Not unless you play with me dummy!"
Yes? Yes! YES!
Okay, what does she know?
What kind of songs would she know?
What kind of instruments does she even play?
If she even played any well enough to keep up with my skills?
Don't mean to brag but, oh yeah, I was well versed in my drumming abilities.
So perhaps we'd start off with something simple, something easy.
Oh, perhaps maybe a simple ballad on an acoustic guitar? Simple jazz beats I could play in a heartbeat.
Or maybe even an easy rock song, oh, 'The Unforgiven' might be a goo-"
"'Be Quiet and Drive' right?"
My answer was already delivered before my mind could think of an appropriate one.
"YAY! I'll get the rest of the guys!"
YOU WITCH, STOP THIS NONSENSE
HE CAN'T DELVE BACK LIKE THIS
Shut the fuck up and let them
P…Please don't
and why shouldn't I?
He's getting everything
Everything he's wanted
You're just a control freak
He can't
He will
THY CAN'T KNOW
HE, he… can't…
FUCKING DEGENERATE HE-
If you're worried, I'll tell him eventually
Fuck off and let him be
…he won't last…
You don't think I know that darling?
…fucking temptress…
Says you
…His mind is mine bitch
Whatever
__________