Cassius sat cross-legged on the floor beside the cradle, one arm awkwardly cradling his spawn—his spawn—and the other clumsily holding the bottle to the infant's mouth. The demon king, the terror of ten kingdoms, the breaker of pacts and destroyer of heaven's second moon… now reduced to a glorified feeding chair.
"Greedy little beast," he muttered under his breath, brow twitching as the baby suckled happily, one tiny hand gripping his sleeve with disturbing strength. "You drink like you've been starving since conception."
The baby blinked up at him, wide-eyed. Innocent. Smug.
Cassius sneered. "I've slain gods more merciful than you. Did you know that? Wailing at me like some damned alarm spell..."
He shifted, trying to get more comfortable. His left leg was already numb. His right arm? Cramping. He hadn't even sat this long in centuries. "You're lucky I don't throw you into a rift and leave you to stew in the timeless void."
The baby gurgled.
Cassius narrowed his eyes. "Is that amusement? Are you mocking me?"
The baby kicked his feet gleefully.
"Mocking your father," he hissed. "The King of Shadows. Unbelievable."
Then—without warning—the baby's smile faded.
Cassius stiffened.
Those crimson eyes welled up with tears, shiny and sharp, glittering unnaturally in the late afternoon light. His lip quivered.
"No," Cassius said flatly. "Don't you dare."
Too late.
The cry that ripped through the air was not of this world. It was power. A sound that shattered silence, cracked through shadow, and twisted the magic around the room like a wrung cloth. The air sizzled. Cassius's head jerked up just in time to see a flash of pale blue—CRACK!
A bolt of lightning erupted from nowhere, aimed directly at his face. With a snarl, he lifted his free hand. A wall of shadows flared up, absorbing the bolt—but not without cost. The sheer weight of it pressed into his bones, magic that felt strangely familiar. His own power, but... raw. Unfiltered. Childish.
The baby hiccupped. Then paused. Then giggled.
Cassius stared at him, appalled. "You dare to strike me?! I will end you."
More giggling.
"Stop that," he hissed. "I am not a jester. I do not exist for your amusement, you pint-sized war crime."
The baby giggled louder.
"Oh, you think this is funny? You want funny?" Cassius leaned in, voice dripping with malice. "You're going to grow up with symmetrical horns. Do you understand that? I'll file them myself."
The baby made a happy little noise and—hands balling into fists—promptly summoned another bolt of lightning. Cassius blocked it again, snarling. The shadows buckled under the pressure.
"That's it!" he barked, rising to his feet with the baby still nestled under his arm like a football. "You want war? You want magic? I will teach you fear, you toothless storm demon in training!"
Another bolt.
He deflected it.
Another.
He batted it away with his elbow.
And then, panting, hair slightly singed, eyes glowing with fury, he stood in the middle of the nursery and shouted: "I WAS THE KING OF DAMNATION!"
The baby blinked.
Then giggled.
Cassius lowered his head into one hand, exhaling so slowly the shadows near his feet flickered with tension. "This isn't real," he muttered to himself. "It's a curse. An illusion. Some cruel spell I've fallen into. Any moment now, I'll wake up on my throne, surrounded by screaming souls and writhing agony. Not… this."
The door creaked open behind him.
Sabine walked in, holding a plate with steaming scrambled eggs and something that looked like bacon—but probably wasn't, knowing her weird village. She paused at the sight of him—disheveled, singed, one eye twitching, baby happily cooing in his grip.
"...Did he zap you again?" she asked.
Cassius didn't even turn. "He's a menace. A magical landmine disguised as a child."
Sabine bit back a grin. "He only zaps people he doesn't like."
"Then I'll take it as a compliment."
She walked over and held out the plate. "You need to eat. You look... dehydrated. Or deranged. Possibly both."
"I do not eat mortal food," he said coldly.
Sabine raised a brow. "You literally devoured two chicken legs last time I saw you."
"That was survival," he snapped. "This is indulgence."
"It's eggs."
"I've eaten better meals. This is beneath me."
Sabine rolled her eyes and set the plate on the edge of the crib. "Suit yourself. But the baby's going to be hungry again in two hours, and I'm taking a nap. If he cries, it's your problem."
"I will not be blackmailed by a woman who once tripped over her own sword."
"And yet here you are," she said sweetly, heading for the door. "King of Diapers. Lord of Lightning Babies."
"I hate you," Cassius growled after her.
Sabine just winked. "Keep telling yourself that."
The baby cooed again, gripping Cassius's shirt with those tiny hands. Cassius looked down, exhausted. "If you zap me again, I swear on the sixth seal of the abyss, I will put you in a floating orb until your horns are fully grown."
The baby burped.
Cassius sighed, his shadows sparking from his fingertips as he settled back down onto the floor. "Unbelievable," he muttered. "Nine hundred years of warfare, and this is the thing that breaks me…"