[Roar]: A loud cry that drives off wild Pokémon. (In battle, this move forces your opponent to switch out their active Pokémon.)
Overwhelmed by a swirling storm of frustration, embarrassment, rage, and despair—Charmander somehow unlocked a legit Pokémon move: Roar.
That bellow he let out? It had literally scared off every living creature in the area.
"Grrah grrah grrah…" (Holy crap—I actually just used a Pokémon move! I can learn moves?! That's awesome—wait, NO, it's not! What use is this move right now?! My house is gone! Where am I even gonna sleep tonight?!)
Charmander-Max clutched his tiny head with both claws, absolutely spiraling.
When the dust finally settled, and he looked out at what was left of the place—which resembled the aftermath of three grenades and a rocket launcher—he had to admit…
Charmander's combat power? Yeah, it was insane.
But no point crying over exploded apartments.
Max's eyes lit up with a spark of hope. He suddenly bolted into the ruins, arms wide, stubby legs sprinting, digging around like a tiny scavenger with purpose.
He used his claws to toss aside bricks and debris like it was nothing. Under layers of splinters and dust, he finally found it—today's bread haul.
"Grraaa~nahh~~" (Thank Arceus the bread's rock-hard. No way I'm wasting it. I'm a Charmander now, so eating this shouldn't give me food poisoning… probably.)
Sure, it was dirty. But hey—he had a Pokémon stomach now. Probably came with a free poison resistance perk or something.
"Grrah…" (Wait a second—what if I just burn off the crust? Char it. Scrape the ashes. Boom. Safe to eat.)
The thought of food supercharged his brain cells.
He ran a mental check. No flamethrower yet, but he did remember two specific moves in his skill set: Ember and Smokescreen.
He opened his mouth and puffed a little cloud of smoke onto his paw. Sniffed it.
Smelled like charcoal. And just a hint of gas.
Charmander's eyes widened—he had an idea.
Charcoal + gas + spark = Flamethrower prototype.
Dark smoke billowed from his mouth, engulfing the bread.
And just as he sprayed, he snapped his jaws—CLACK—tiny teeth smashing together. A spark flew.
BOOM—IGNITION.
Move: Spark – Strike your teeth to ignite.
The crust of the bread blackened instantly, along with the wood chips and dust stuck to it.
With surgical precision, Charmander scraped off the charred shell and devoured it whole.
CRUNCH. CRUNCH.
(Tbh… not bad.)
One after another, he munched through every piece of bread hidden in the ruins.
A warm, toasted aroma slowly filled the wreckage of what used to be his apartment.
Then—
"Holy 🦀—WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! THAT WAS MY SAFEHOUSE!!!"
A familiar voice rang out behind him. And based on the tone—yeah. She was pissed.
Charmander froze mid-bite. Tail stiff as a rod. Cold sweat broke out down his scaly back.
Like a rusty gear grinding to life, his head turned around in slow, agonizing motion.
"Grraah~" (Heyyy… Aunt Selina… fancy seeing you here~)
Selina had spotted the fire-tailed orange lizard from a distance.
At first, she was just curious what it was up to. But the closer she got… the more the horror set in.
Her safehouse?
Gone. Reduced to ashes. Like it had just starred in an action movie explosion scene.
The destruction level was so bad, calling it a rocket strike zone might've been an understatement.
"Grrah grrah!!" (Aunt Selina, wait, listen! Crap—she can't understand me like this!!)
Of course Selina knew who this oversized gecko was. The green Omnitrix logo still glowed on its tail.
"Speak English. Now."
Her teeth clenched. Her voice, cold steel. That safehouse had taken forever to build—and this was Gotham, the worst place on Earth to try building something that doesn't get stolen, burned down, or priced like gold.
Even Catwoman had to work her tail off for that place.
"Grrah—" (I'd love to! But Charmander doesn't come with a built-in voice box, alright?!)
Then it hit him—Selina could hit the Omnitrix for him!
Max spun around, lifted his tail, and started urgently pointing at the glowing icon near its base, calling out "grrah grrah!" in a desperate attempt to mime: Press the button! End the transformation!
But from Selina's perspective…
This little lizard was pointing its flaming butt at her and barking like a bratty Pokémon TikToker.
Disrespect detected.
Her fists clenched.
Selina grabbed her whip and snapped it through the air like lightning, aiming straight for Charmander's butt.
From Max's perspective, the attack was crystal clear.
With a quick side step, he dodged it clean.
"Grrah grrah!!" (WHOA WHOA WHOA Aunt Selina, THIS IS A MISUNDERSTANDING! Let's talk this out—no need for violence!!)
CRACK!
The whip slammed into the ruins, shattering bricks and kicking up dust.
Charmander flinched hard.
(Holy crap, that would've HURT.)
Max's brain hit emergency overdrive.
"GRRAH GRRAH GRRAHHH!!"
(Stop swinging that thing!! Look—see this symbol?! PRESS IT. PLEASE.)
But to Selina, this fiery lizard just kept hopping around and taunting her with its butt like it was saying:
"Nyeh nyeh, can't hit me!"
Her last nerve? Gone.
"Okay. That's it. I'm gonna END you."
She cracked the whip. Again. And again.
CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK!
Each sonic boom echoed off the wreckage.
Charmander weaved, ducked, jumped—barely dodging every lash like he was in a Pokémon version of The Matrix.
Charmander had just activated Ash Ketchum's ultimate hidden technique:
"Quick, dodge it!"
As long as he stayed laser-focused, that whip wasn't touching him.
Selina, clearly annoyed at how agile this little lizard was, retracted her whip. Time to take it up close and personal. She still pegged Max's combat level as "easy capture"—like back when she caught that little Meowth.
Except now?
She had claws. Literally. Her gloves were upgraded with metal tips—classic Catwoman style. 🐾
Seeing she wasn't gonna back down, Max knew there was no avoiding this anymore.
Time to fight back.
He inhaled sharply—and blasted a wave of thick black smoke straight in her face.
Move: Smokescreen – A choking cloud of carbon dust, reducing visibility and screwing with accuracy!
Selina charged in—straight into the smog. But the moment the dark mist hit her face, her sight dimmed, her breath caught.
"Sh*t—smoke bomb?!"
She coughed and immediately started backing out, trying to escape the carbon cloud.
But Charmander was already on the move.
He pounced forward—and the second her eyes adjusted, he hit her with another skill:
Scary Face.
A horrifying, soul-jarring grimace full of cursed energy.
It hit like a psychic grenade—Selina's brain lagged, her reaction time tanked, and her limbs moved like they were stuck in molasses.
Then—
Boom. Tone shift.
Charmander's face went from demonic horror movie to… sparkly-eyed cuteness overload.
Move: Charm.
He fluttered his lashes and gave Selina the most adorable wink ever seen in Gotham.
💘 A pink heart of energy launched straight from his eyes—and hit its target dead-on.
Critical hit.
Selina blinked. Her whole vibe flipped.
Suddenly, this fiery little gremlin… wasn't an enemy.
He was a precious, snuggly, squishy-wishy baby.
"Ohhh, aren't you just the cutest thing ever?!"
Charmander froze.
(…What the—?!)
Five seconds ago she was trying to whip his tail off. Now she looked ready to knit him a scarf.
(That move is terrifying. One second you're enemies, the next she's ready to adopt me?! Is this a battle move or emotional manipulation?!)
Still—whatever. It worked.
Charmander took his shot.
"Grrah grrah…"
(Hey! Help me out. Smack this logo so I can change back—please!)
He pointed frantically to the Omnitrix symbol at the base of his tail, miming a high-five motion like he was playing charades for his life.
Whether it was the lingering Charm effect or just Selina catching on, she actually nodded, like she understood.
And casually, with one swift motion—
SMACK.
A red light flashed.
Charmander dissolved in a burst of energy—and Max stood there in human form once again.
"Whew… finally back. That stupid watch just taught me a very important lesson—never underestimate any lifeform. Charmander's destruction level? Easily outclasses a husky."
He barely had time to breathe before realizing…
Selina was still affected.
Her eyes were all gooey, soft, sparkly. That warm, mushy gaze pierced right into his soul.
Max's spine shivered.
"Oh no."
Because nothing—and I mean nothing—was creepier than Catwoman making bedroom eyes at a kid she was trying to kill five minutes ago.