After a breakfast that drained my emotions...
I tried to forget the brick-like bread and leaf water that just guided me into a new phase of life full of suffering. Maybe I could enjoy a bit of 'relaxation' to relieve the stress.
Stepping out of the inn, I saw a large banner hanging near the road:
"Matei Kingdom Spa – Refresh Your Body & Soul! Special Discount This Morning!"
I walked closer with curiosity—because, who knows, this could be the opportunity to rejuvenate after sleeping in a place that felt more like a prison than a five-star hotel. I went in.
A man in a white outfit and head covering that looked more like a ninja cloak than a massage therapist greeted me.
"Welcome to the royal spa, Miss! Special service today: Body Refreshment with Cold Water! Soothing the Mind and Rejuvenating the Senses."
...I raised an eyebrow.
"Cold water refreshment? That... doesn't just mean I'll feel like I was doused with a bucket of water when I wake up, right?"
The man smiled.
A smile that was too wide and suspicious.
"Of course, Miss! We use a traditional technique that's been practiced for centuries. It's incredibly soothing, and you'll feel like you've been born again!"
Thinking "Brace yourself, Aria, your life could get worse," I followed him into the spa room.
Once inside, I was told to lie down on a bed, and the spa attendant poured cold water onto my body from a large bucket.
Brrrrr!
"Wow, this… is truly a new way to kill someone quickly," I said, trying to hold back my shivering teeth.
The man looked serious.
"Yes, the effects are remarkable! It makes the body feel refreshed, the skin tighter, and of course, the mind sharper!"
I stared at him.
"If I'm already frozen to death, does that count as part of the refreshing technique?" I asked, trying to find an escape route without looking completely insane.
After a few seconds of waiting, he finally stopped and handed me a towel that was colder than my emotions after breakfast.
"So, Miss, do you feel refreshed?" he asked eagerly, as if I had just gone through a life-changing experience.
I frowned, rubbing my head and body that were beginning to feel numb.
"Refreshed, sure, if refreshed means numb. But yeah, I feel more alive than before—before I realized I could be frozen."
He smiled triumphantly, while I tried to warm myself by thinking: This is a world where nightmares can become reality.
After the truly chilling spa experience...
I stepped out of the spa room, half-frozen and with a face that couldn't hide my confusion.
It felt more like I had just taken a body endurance test, not a relaxation treatment.
But hey, maybe there was something even weirder out there.
As soon as I stepped outside, I found myself in a bustling market.
People were busy selling all sorts of bizarre items.
There was a vendor selling... fireballs in little bottles.
Apparently, these fireballs could be used to make food spicier.
Needless to say, I wasn't interested in trying them.
Then there was also someone selling bread shaped like human faces, which supposedly brought good luck, but I couldn't help wondering if this was some form of advanced art.
"Human face-shaped bread? Hmmm, if it could be shaped like my own face, I'd buy it," I said, winking.
Not far from there, I saw a middle-aged man holding a wooden board that read "Swap Bodies! Swap Fates!"
"Wow, now this sounds interesting. Swap bodies? Swap fates? Is this some kind of reincarnation sale?" I murmured as I approached.
He greeted me with a smile wider than the receptionist's at the inn earlier.
"Welcome! Would you like to swap your fate or your body? For just one silver coin, I can make you someone else for a day!"
I stared at him with a look full of doubt.
"Swap bodies? So, for example, I could become... the King of the kingdom?" I asked, half-joking, half-hoping he'd say yes.
The man immediately nodded enthusiastically.
"Of course, Miss! But only for a day, so enjoy your time being someone important! You could try being a bread vendor, or even... maybe that spa attendant, so you can experience their 'refreshing' service!" he said, with a hopeful smile so wide that I almost felt sorry for him.
I shook my head.
"Don't even think about it. I'm not swapping bodies with someone who sells cold water. If I'm going to swap, I'd rather be someone with common sense."
The man looked disappointed but quickly added, "Well then, maybe you'd like to swap your fate! For just 5 silver coins, I can drastically change your fate!"
I paused for a moment, thinking about how bad my fate currently was.
But once again, I could only laugh.
"If swapping fate means my fate could be better than it is now, maybe I'd swap, but don't expect me to hand over my last savings for that."
The man nodded, a bit disappointed, as I walked away.
"Matei Kingdom really is full of surprises," I thought. "But luckily, these surprises are more funny than scam"