Jay-jay's POV
I don't want to remember my past. It's not clear to me what really happened, but I know those memories are filled with what Mama's husbands did to me. Every time I think about it, it feels like something's churning in my stomach, and all I want to do is cry.
I once overheard my aunts talking about some of the things they did to me. I immediately tried to forget those things because even I couldn't accept that they actually happened.
Disgusting, infuriating, nauseating.
But no matter how much I try to push those memories away, they keep coming back. And for the first time, I want to know what really happened in the last memory that resurfaced.
"That was Mama," I said absentmindedly.
"Jay," Yuri called my name, holding both my hands.
"Maybe it's about time you visit a psychiatrist."
I quickly shook my head, fear evident in my eyes. Aside from Kei—kwanan, Yuri also knew about my situation.
"N-no. I don't want to—."
He cupped my face with both hands. "You need to, Jay—."
"—No. I don't want to go—."
"—They will help you remember your past."
"—I don't want to."
My tears fell on their own. He quickly pulled me into a tight hug, and I broke down sobbing.
"I don't want to," I kept repeating through my tears.
"Okay. I won't force you anymore."
He just let me cry on his chest, his hand gently rubbing my back. Every now and then, he ran his fingers through my hair.
Don't mess this up.
I only stopped crying when the door opened, and Kei—kwanan entered, carrying a glass of water. I pulled away from Yuri, wiped my tears, and reached out for the glass, but Kei—kwanan just stared at my hand.
"This isn't yours," he said.
How rude!
I glared at him, and that mischievous smile of his appeared before he finally handed me the glass of water.
"Just kidding."
"You're such a jerk," I muttered, but Yuri still heard it.
Kei—kwanan chuckled softly as I drank the water. I didn't even realize I had emptied the glass so quickly. I handed it back to him, and he placed it on the table near the door.
"Are you done with your heart-to-heart talk?" he asked Yuri.
I raised an eyebrow at them, especially when Yuri glared at him before standing up from his seat beside me. Kei—kwanan quickly took his place.
"Jay… Yuri is—."
"Are you going to force me too?" I cut him off, but he shook his head.
"He's dumb."
"What?" Yuri asked, clearly offended.
"Forcing Jay-jay to remember her past is like forcing her to jump out of the window," the so-called King of Snakes explained. "Of your house," he added, pointing at Yuri.
Yuri's house was so high.
"Since when did you become an expert on Jay's problems?" Yuri asked, irritated.
"Since the day I planned my future with her," Kei—kwanan replied with a wink.
Yuri and I rolled our eyes at him. This guy always had too much to say. He was bound to slip up eventually.
Idiot.
"Why are you even here? Shouldn't you be looking after your students outside?"
"I'm keeping an eye on you. In case Yuri tries something."
My palm instantly flew toward him, but he caught my arm swiftly.
I knew Yuri was only here to check on me. And I was right—he didn't believe me when I said I was fine earlier. I understood why he was worried. What I didn't understand was why Kei—kwanan always had to be so annoying.
"As if we're the same," Yuri said, irritated. "I wouldn't kiss someone who's asleep."
I looked at him in surprise, then turned to Kei—kwanan. He showed no reaction, just smiled at me before answering Yuri.
"Who kissed someone who's asleep?" he asked innocently.
"Do you want me to remind you what you did to Jay while she was unconscious in the clinic?"
I think I remembered that.
"That was when I got so angry, and then suddenly I passed out, right?" I asked.
Yuri nodded. I immediately shot a glare at the annoying idiot in front of me. He pretended to know nothing about what we were talking about.
"What did you do?" I asked, clearly annoyed.
"What did I do?" he asked back.
I hit his arm without warning. He didn't expect it and failed to block my hand. He winced in pain.
"I'll kick your wound!" I threatened.
He scratched the back of his head, looking guilty.
"W-well… while you were unconscious, I paid you a visit," he began, and I was really waiting for his explanation. "Then I—." He coughed lightly. "I… I… I k-kissed you."
My eyes slowly widened. He stole a kiss from me. And back then, I was still furious at him.
"You animal!" I snapped, grabbing a pillow and hitting him with it.
He only responded with loud laughter. Until I decided to poke his wound. He let out a loud yelp before falling to the floor.
Yuri and I burst into laughter.
"Karma has been served," Yuri said, making me laugh even harder.
The idiot slowly stood up, forcing a smile despite the obvious pain he was still feeling.
Try teasing me again.
"Yuri," he called out seriously, making Yuri and me glance at each other in confusion.
"What for?" the SLC President asked.
"We just need to fix Caretaker," Kei—kwanan replied, making my eyes widen.
You idiot!
I quickly moved closer to him and covered his mouth. Yuri looked at me curiously, clearly waiting for an explanation.
"Who?"
"N-nobody. He's just messing around," I said with a forced smile while squeezing Kei—kwanan's mouth shut. "You should probably head out first. We'll follow."
Yuri glanced at Kei—kwanan for a moment before nodding and stepping out of the room. As soon as the door closed, I finally let go of the troublemaker.
I was ready to rain curses on him when he suddenly hugged me tightly. I thought he was going to tease me again, but his hug was firm, filled with a worry that wouldn't go away.
I thought he was just messing around.
"It's okay, we're here for you. Whatever it is," he whispered and kissed the top of my head.
I didn't know why, but my arms wrapped around him on their own. I was scared of what would happen when all my memories returned. But when they reminded me that they were there, I felt like I could face my past.
"What if they did something to me that's unforgivable? Would you still stay?" I asked.
"Could anything be worse than you dancing with fire while looking for a virgin to sacrifice to a demon?" he joked, making us both laugh.
He just had to remind me of that.
"I'm serious," I said.
"I told you, whatever it is…" He faced me and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. "…our friends and I will stay here for you." He held my chin, lifting my face to look at him. "Understand?"
I nodded, and he smiled.
"Now kiss me," he commanded, making me scowl.
You're unbelievable!
"I'll kick you!" I warned, pulling away from him.
"A kiss first, then you can kick me," he teased, trying to pull me back toward him.
I pushed his face away as he puckered his lips. I wanted to laugh, but I didn't want him to think I was playing hard to get. If I let him kiss me willingly, it would mean I'd forgiven him completely.
It's not quite there yet.
He was about to insist if not for the sudden banging on the bedroom door.
"Are you guys done?! Let's go downstairs, we're about to start grilling!" Ci-N shouted from outside the door.
"We're coming!" I replied.
I heard her heavy footsteps moving away from the door.
We followed as I said. While we were going down the stairs, the King of Snakes kept nudging me. Every time I glanced at him, he held up one finger and pouted his lips toward me.
I glared at him to warn him, but he just kept repeating the gesture. Until we reached the living room, where we ran into Kit putting on a shirt while walking, clearly fresh from a shower. But I froze when I saw Mayo behind him—shirtless and towel-drying his hair.
Did they… shower together? I was about to ask when Eren suddenly walked in and gave them a sharp look.
"Why did you take so long?" he asked irritably.
"None of your business," Mayo retorted.
"What's your problem? Have some shame—there are innocent people here!"
"Innocent, my foot," Kit shot back. "We didn't do anything. I showered first. I was just waiting for him."
Eren narrowed his eyes at them, clearly unwilling to believe their explanation. I had a feeling Mayo would lose his temper if this kept up.
So I decided to step in.
"Hey, what are you guys arguing about?" I asked, feigning curiosity.
"It's Eren—he's got a dirty mind," Mayo tattled.
"You're obvious. Even without a dirty mind, I can tell," Eren defended.
"Why? What could they possibly have done?" I asked—and everyone turned to stare at me.
It was like they couldn't believe I'd asked such a question. It felt like they were seconds away from knocking on my head just to check if there was anything inside.
Kit shook his head. "Nothing, Jay. Nothing."
One by one, they all avoided my gaze and headed outside.
I turned to Kei—kwanan and saw his face light up like my confusion had just added fuel to his fire.
What? What could they have done?
"Why do you look like that?"
"Nothing. Let's go outside," he said.
I let it go and followed him out of the house. Everyone was already gathered around the bonfire they had set up. This was where we'd have our barbecue dinner.
Yes… barbecue.
"Over here, Jay-jay!" Ci called out, waving.
I ran over to them. Felix and David were arranging the firewood, making sure the flames wouldn't get too strong or too weak. Eman was busy preparing the meat with Denzel and Blaster, who clearly couldn't wait. Josh was focused on a guitar I didn't know where they'd gotten, and beside him, Calix was teaching him how to play. Edrix and Rory, meanwhile, looked like they were on the verge of a fight.
"I'm telling on you—to Fre—friend!" Rory threatened.
"You're annoying! Next time I won't tell you who I like if you keep teasing me!" Edrix shot back, frustrated.
Drew quickly stepped between them. Eren was still teasing Mayo and Kit, but the two ignored him. Yuri was busy with the drinks. I thought I saw some alcohol, but he quickly shut the cooler before I could be sure.
"Are we starting yet?" I asked Eman before sitting next to Ci-N.
"Almost—Blaster! I swear I'm going to stab you with a barbecue stick!" Eman threatened when Blaster started playing with the meat.
"It's taking too long! I'm starving!"
"Sit down and be quiet!" Denzel ordered.
Pouting, Blaster stood up and went over to Josh. But before he could even settle down, he started bothering Calix and Josh.
"If you don't stop, I'm going to hit you with this," Josh threatened calmly, pointing at the guitar.
Terrifying.
Blaster immediately backed off and went off to find someone else to annoy. Our eyes met—and the rascal grinned widely. He ran toward us and plopped down next to me.
"How's it going?" he asked teasingly.
"Do you want to go home with a broken face?" I asked seriously—and his smug grin vanished instantly.
"Jeez… I was just asking," he said, sounding hurt.
"You were just going to tease me."
"No, I wasn't."
I narrowed my eyes at him. He raised his hands like he was making a promise.
I decided to let it go and let him sit with us. And true enough, he didn't tease me anymore, especially when our conversation got deeper.
We even talked about what was happening with Keigan and his best friend, who was also his girlfriend. Apparently, the girl had been avoiding him for a while, but Keigan kept approaching her because he was worried. But what surprised me was what Blaster said next.
"Sometimes, she says it feels like she's talking to someone else, like Keigan's not the same boyfriend she knew."
The worry in his voice was clear. As much as I wanted to say something comforting, I figured it was better to just listen. I might say the wrong thing otherwise.
"If it were up to me, I'd want them to break up. I'm scared for her," he added.
"Why?"
He leaned in closer to whisper. "Keifer won't admit it, but his brother's got something wrong in his head."
I lowered my head. I wanted to get mad at Blaster for saying that—but what did he really know? Still, I couldn't help but feel hurt.
Keifer said we had the same symptoms. If Keigan was crazy, did that mean I was crazy too? My breathing grew heavy, and it felt like something was stuck in my throat. I quickly excused myself to get away.
I walked to the shoreline and watched the sun set. Almost all the light was gone, and darkness had started taking over. I focused on the view—and it worked.
"The sunset really is beautiful," Calix commented. "Next time, I'm bringing Mica."
Good for you.
After watching the sunset, we went back to the bonfire to wait for the barbecue. Everyone was singing and telling stories.
"Who wants some?" Edrix offered, holding up a bottle.
It really was alcohol! Almost everyone raised their hands, and Edrix quickly handed drinks around.
I raised my hand, too.
"Me too!" I said—and everyone froze, staring at me.
I knew exactly what they were thinking. I shot them a glare.
"You know, Jay," Rory said. "Water is good for you. There's also coconut juice."
I pouted. "Just one bottle."
Edrix handed me a cold bottle—of water. I had meant the alcohol, but they gave me a different bottle.
"No alcohol for you," David said.
Everyone burst into laughter, which quickly turned into teasing. Soon, some of them stood up and started dancing around the fire—Ci-N even joined in with a chicken dance.
Even though I was annoyed, I couldn't help but laugh. I let them tease me.
Who would've thought we'd all be here together for this small outing—complete with food, teasing, and laughter?
Most of all—we were complete.
But for how long?