Elir waited until Seeta left, then entered Nier's room and sat beside him.
Elir… was in no better condition than Nier… He was exhausted… His movements were slow… His frail body looked like skin over bone…
Nier didn't know what to say—he just looked at Elir.
That hospital room… was extremely cold. Nier pulled the blanket tighter around himself, muttering, "Elir…"
Elir didn't reply. He simply started undoing Nier's bandages to change them.
Nier watched him, murmuring, "Elir!"
While removing the old bandages, Elir said, "Your mother and brothers are okay, their names are on the list."
Tears streamed from Nier's eyes, and he said again, "Elir!"
Elir slammed his hand on the small table beside Nier. The tray of medical tools clattered, and he shouted in a frightening voice, "Stop!"
Nier startled and looked at Elir, who continued, "What is it you want to say? You traitor!"
Nier answered sadly, through his tears, "Traitor?"
Elir shouted in anger, "Yes!!" He stood up and continued, as though yelling, "You betrayed me!! You left me! You died and left me!!"
In a weak voice, Nier said, "But I'm here now!"
Elir cried out, pressing both hands to his head, "But you might not have been here! You might not have been here at all!"
He sat down again, his body collapsing into the chair, and spoke in a low voice, "You might not have been at all…"
Elir rested his elbows on his thighs, holding his head in his hands, eyes on the floor. "Why… Why did you do that, Nier?"
Nier looked at Elir's body. He was breathing heavily… As if each breath caused him pain… The bulge of wing-exit wounds still protruded from his back… His body was covered in bruises of every color.
Shaking his head as though unable to believe, Nier said, "What? What are you talking about, Elir? Why did I save you?"
Elir clenched his teeth, trying to contain his anger, and shouted, "Yes! You can live without me, Nier… You can go on living… But I… I can't live without you… I can't do anything without you… What would I do—what would I do with my life if you weren't here?"
Nier didn't understand… He didn't understand what Elir meant… So he asked, "Should I have let you die, then? Is that what you want from me?"
Elir lifted his head, revealing his thin face, creased with anger. "Yes, that's what I want!"
Nier, in pain, said, "How much of a burden am I… I'm not supposed to save my only friend… I should just sit and wait for him to save me… I can't do anything right…"
Elir, puzzled, said, "What?"
With tears pouring down his cheeks, Nier answered, "I was a burden right from the start of the battle… I couldn't kill them… Even after all they did… I couldn't bring myself to kill them… So I thought…" He looked at Elir, weeping, "If I sacrificed myself to save you… At least I'd be useful one time!"
Elir's eyes went wide in shock. He stared at Nier before dropping his head onto Nier's bed and speaking in a muffled voice, "How… How could you even think of something like that?"
Nier cried, "I'm sorry, Elir… I really am…"
Elir stayed like that for a while, then lifted his head and said calmly, "You don't have to kill, Nier… You don't need to stain your hands… It's fine… I'll kill anyone you want… I'll spill the blood myself… I'm your weapon."
Tears streamed from Nier's eyes as he said, "How can you say something like that? I can't!"
Elir continued, "You cried for me… I'll kill for you…"
Elir's face looked tired and sad as he added, "Which is why… Don't risk your life again… Nier…"
Nier looked at him for a moment, then his face twisted. His grip on the blanket tightened as he said, "Those things… The things that creature inside my body said…"
Elir's eyes widened. His heart thumped hard at the memory, and he buried his face even more into Nier's blanket.
Nier went on, tears streaming down his face, "I would never say something like that to you, Elir!"
Elir's voice trembled as he pleaded, "Nier! Just promise me!!"
Nier shouted, "Aren't you listening?? I was looking at your wounds and scars, and I couldn't do anything! Yet my body was spouting such words at you… And now you want me to promise never to risk my life for you again?! What do you think I am?"
Nier thumped his chest. Elir could hear the pain rising in Nier's voice, "Do you think I don't have a heart?! Don't you ever think about how I feel?"
Elir shouted back, "I only think about you! All I can think about are those wounds on your body… Your cold body, and your eyes that refused to open…"
Elir burst into tears. His voice was hard to make out, "I kept calling and calling, and you never answered… You never answered me… And I was terrified… Terrified I'd never hear your voice again…"
His voice grew weaker, "So promise me!"
Nier stared at him with wide, teary eyes. He didn't know what to say—he never knew how to respond to Elir.
Nier's face crinkled in anger, and he said, "I won't promise you anything!! If you don't want me to die, then just save me before it happens!! Don't dump your responsibilities onto me!"
Elir looked exhausted as he stared at Nier. Would he never give in? Nier was always so stubborn!
They stayed like that… on Nier's bed.
Finally, he could sleep…
Finally… he could rest.