Aries's POV
Her forehead was red. It looked like I had hit her too hard. But even so, she was sleeping soundly.
Her eyes were swollen from crying. If there was anything that hadn't changed about her—aside from her stubbornness—it was her tendency to cry a lot.
I couldn't help but smile. Even at a young age, I still remembered how I used to take care of her.
Flashback...
"Ari!"
"Aris," I corrected.
"Where's Mama?" she asked, his round eyes looking up at me.
"She's still at work."
She lowered her head and picked up some stones from the ground. "Oh, so long."
I took her hand and dusted it off, making her drop the stones she had picked up. Mama said the soil was dirty and that Jay-jay could get worms, so she shouldn't be touching it.
"Dirty! Let go!" I scolded her.
"I was just looking at them."
I looked at our old gate when a tricycle stopped in front of it. Mama slowly got out. I let go of Jay-jay's hand and ran to greet her with a smile. I even opened the gate for her.
"Mama!" I greeted her.
But she didn't respond. She walked past me as if she hadn't seen me. She quickly went to Jay-jay and hugged her.
"Mama!" Jay shouted joyfully. "Why were you so late?"
"Did you miss Mama? I was working."
Jay nodded at her. Mama then looked at me.
"Close the gate and come inside," she said, walking straight into the house.
I did as she said and ran inside. I saw her opening a plastic bag full of food.
"So much food! Look, Ari!"
"Kuya Aries," Mama corrected. "...He's older than you."
Every time Mama came home from work, she always brought food. She said it was given by her boss. Sometimes, she even brought toys for me and Jay-jay.
But I preferred it when Mama just stayed home. I liked it better when we could be with her.
One day, Mama came home from work with something red on her face. It looked like a mark beside her lip. She was furious, like she had just fought with someone.
Ate Jamela Mae arrived—the woman who lived next door. They started yelling at each other inside the house, and I had no idea why.
"Are they fighting?" Jay asked.
I noticed she was starting to cry. I immediately went to her and stroked her head.
"No. They're friends. They're not fighting," I reassured her.
"Really?"
"Yes. I'll check for you," I said and walked into the house.
I didn't think they were actually fighting. Mama was just sitting on a bench in front of the table, and so was Ate Jamela. They just had loud voices.
"That bastard! No wonder he was being so nice! He had a plan all along!" Mama said angrily. "...Bringing me groceries as if I'd just go along with it?! What does he think I am? Just because my children have different fathers, he thinks I'd agree to that?!"
"I get it! You have a point! But what I don't understand is, why did you slam your head against the wall?!" Ate Jamela said in frustration.
Mama pointed at the side of her lip. "That asshole slapped me! Does he think I'll be scared of him just because he hit me?!"
Ate scratched her head violently. "What about you now?! And your kids?!"
"I don't care! I'll just find another job where I can take my child with me. I'm enrolling Aries in school."
"And money?! School fees, supplies, uniform?!"
"I still have some money."
"Really? How long will that last?"
"I don't know!"
"Just go back home! Introduce your kids to your mother!"
"She's not my mother! Do I have to keep repeating that I'm just an illegitimate child of that bastard father of mine?! His wife was just kind enough to take me in."
"Why did you leave in the first place?!"
"When I got pregnant with Aries. My siblings fought with me. I just left—I got tired of it!"
"Then call Jay-jay's father. He's rich, right? He's the one who gave you this land and house, isn't he?"
Mama didn't answer. She suddenly turned toward me and glared.
"Didn't I tell you to watch Jay-jay? Why are you inside? GET OUT!"
I ran outside. I saw Jay-jay digging into the dirt. I went to her again and took her hands.
"Are they fighting?" she asked again.
I shook my head. "No. Just talking." I just didn't understand what they were talking about. And what did "illegitimate child" mean? Was that us? Since we were outside?
I chose to ignore it and just played with Jay-jay. I also told her that Mama was enrolling me in school. I always saw Ate Jamela's kid leaving the house, saying he was going to school. Maybe I'd go there too. I hoped I could bring my brother with me.
"Aries! Aries! Wake up!" Mama shouted.
I opened my eyes while rubbing them. I saw Mama wrapping Jay-jay in a blanket.
"We're going to the hospital! Bring my bag!" she ordered me.
Even though I didn't know what was happening, I did as she said. I grabbed her bag and went to her. She carried Jay and walked towards the door. She opened it and waited for me.
"Hurry up!" she yelled at me.
I ran outside the house. I was almost at the gate when I stopped to look at her. She locked the door and hurriedly walked towards the gate. It was dark outside, and there was no one on the street.
"Jay! Hold on! We're going to the hospital!" Mama said as she anxiously looked for a ride.
I didn't know how long we had been waiting there when a tricycle passed by. The driver initially refused to take us, but Mama begged him.
When we arrived at the hospital, a woman in white talked to Mama. I still didn't understand what was happening. But I noticed that Jay-jay wasn't speaking. She was unconscious and seemed lifeless.
"You won't be going to school for now," Mama told me.
"Why?"
"Because we have no more money. I used it all to pay the hospital so we could bring Jay-jay home."
"But I want to go to school!" I insisted.
All my playmates were already going to school. I wanted to go with them. I wanted to start studying too.
"I said you can't! We have no money!" she shouted at me.
I shouted back, "But I want to!"
Why couldn't I? I wanted to study. I wanted to be with my playmates there. They said we would be taught how to read and write.
Suddenly, Mama hit me. The pain made me cry. She hit me again. Twice.
"Stop being stubborn! I said it's not possible!" she shouted and hit me again. Her hands landed anywhere, but she didn't stop.
"Stop! No more! No more! Mama!"
"You ungrateful brat! Why can't you understand?" she yelled at me. "...I'm struggling so much! Don't make things harder for me!"
She was about to hit me again when suddenly, an old woman entered through the door. Mama froze and quickly turned to face her.
"Why are you hurting the child?" the woman asked Mama.
She tried to approach me, but Mama immediately blocked her way.
"I'm just disciplining my child," Mama answered.
They stared at each other for a long time. I didn't know her, and it was my first time seeing her. She was carrying a bag and a plastic bag full of things.
She was actually our grandmother—Jay-jay's and mine. She often visited our house to bring us toys and food. She was also the one who watched over us sometimes.
Mama had a new job now. The problem was that she was gone the whole day, unlike before when she only worked half a day. When the long hand of the clock pointed at 12, she would leave, then return before dark.
But now, she left while Jay-jay and I were still sleeping and returned when it was already pitch dark. Sometimes, we would fall asleep waiting for her. Today, Grandma didn't come. Maybe she was busy or too tired. She said the trip here took a long time.
"Ari!" Jay-jay called from inside the house.
I ran inside and looked for her. She was sitting on the floor beside her doll, which had lost its head again. She always removed it.
"Tummy hurts!" she said, clutching her stomach before suddenly bursting into tears.
I went to her and tried to carry her. I sat him on the long bench. I searched for the bottle Mama used for us whenever we had stomach aches. It had a green liquid inside and smelled strange.
I found it in the medicine cabinet. I opened it and copied what Mama did. But I accidentally spilled some on the floor. I left it and went back to Jay-jay, who was still crying.
I lifted her shirt and placed the bottle against her stomach, but she kept crying. I tried to calm her down, but she wouldn't stop.
"I want Mama!" she sobbed.
"Mama is still at work."
Her crying grew louder. I didn't know how to make her stop until I heard the gate open. I ran to meet her, but she glared at me angrily again.
"What did you do? Why is Jay-jay crying?" She ignored me and rushed to Jay, who quickly clung to her.
She was about to take her to bed when she stepped on the spilled green liquid.
"What is this?!" she asked.
She crouched down slightly and sniffed it. She immediately looked for the bottle, which was right behind her.
"Who touched this?"
"I put some on Jay—"
"You idiot! Damn this life! Don't you have a brain?! Why did you let it spill?"
She put Jay down and grabbed a rag. She wiped the floor while mumbling words that Grandma said were "bad words"—words that kids shouldn't repeat.
She kept glancing at me, and I knew she was about to hit me again.
Sometimes, I felt like everything I did was wrong. And sometimes, I thought that maybe... only Jay-jay was the one she truly loved.
"I'm leaving now. Don't forget what I told you! Don't leave Jay-jay." Mama said before stepping out the door.
Jay was still asleep and hadn't woken up yet, so Mama didn't get to say goodbye to him. I went over to him and adjusted her blanket. I was really jealous of her.
Mama loved her so much, while with me, it felt like she wanted me gone.
But it's okay. She's younger than me, so I understand. Babies need their parents' love more—Grandma told me that.
I looked out the window. It seemed like Grandma wouldn't be coming today. I took the toy she gave me and played outside, right in front of the door.
"Aries!" someone called.
I looked around and saw my playmates outside the gate. They were waving at me.
"Come with us!" they invited me.
I stood up and peeked inside the house for a moment. Jay was still asleep, and she wouldn't wake up for a while. I figured I could come back before she woke up. I closed the door and ran out the gate.
"Let's go to the court!" they said, and I followed.
When we got there, some people were playing basketball. We decided to watch for a while because it looked fun. There were a lot of players, passing the ball around. When I grow up, I want to play that too.
I didn't know how long we had been there, but I noticed people starting to leave. That's when I remembered Jay-jay. I hadn't fed her yet.
I said goodbye to my playmates and ran home. The gate and door were both open when I arrived. I suddenly got scared—what if Jay had gone outside?
"Jay-jay!" I called.
As soon as I stepped inside, something suddenly hit me.
I fell to my knees and cried out in pain. When I looked up, I saw Mama. She was holding a hanger, and she was furious.
She hit me again, and this time I screamed from the pain.
"Mama! It hurts!" I cried out.
"I told you not to leave Jay-jay! You're so stubborn!" she yelled, hitting me again.
"Ma! Stop!"
"You don't know how to listen!" She didn't stop hitting me. The hanger landed all over my body—even on my face.
"You want to be outside?! Fine, go outside!" She dragged me out and practically threw me. "...Stay there!"
"No more, Mama!" I begged.
"Will you do it again?! You don't know how to follow instructions!"
"I won't leave Jay-jay again!" I sobbed.
She didn't say anything else and threw the hanger inside the house. She grabbed her bag and left again. I got up and went inside.
I saw Jay-jay sitting on the floor, eating a piece of bread. At least Mama didn't hurt her. Maybe she really loved her more.
Mama left early today. Once again, Jay-jay and I were left alone. I didn't want her to leave yet because Jay was sick again.
She felt hot and weak. I tried waking her up to eat, but she just cried and cried. Then, she fell back asleep.
I was worried about her. I was scared that she might have to go back to the hospital again. They always injected so many medicines into her there.
"Aries!" someone called from outside.
I saw the gate open, and someone entered. They were carrying a bowl. As they got closer, I finally saw who it was—Ate Jamela.
"What is it?" I asked.
"I brought food. Come eat with Jay." she said, walking straight to the table. "Come on... Wake Jay up."
"She's sick. She has a fever and doesn't want to eat."
She immediately went over to Jay and touched his forehead. "She's burning up. Where's your mom?"
"She's at work already."
"She left you like this? That's unbelievable." She stood up and walked over to our clothing drawer. She took a washcloth and wet it in the sink. She wrung it out and folded it neatly before placing it on Jay's forehead.
"I'll check if we have any medicine at home. Go ahead and eat." she said before stepping out.
I did as she said and started eating the food she brought. But I couldn't help glancing at Jay. I really wanted to feed her too.
Ate Jamela returned, bringing the medicine she mentioned. She woke Jay-jay up and forced her to take it. Her sickness always came back.
It had been dark for a while, but Mama still wasn't home. Ate Jamela even went to her workplace to look for her, but she wasn't there. Jay-jay still hadn't gotten better.
I went over to her to put the washcloth back on her forehead. She opened her eyes and looked at me.
"W-where's Mama?" she asked me.
"She's not here yet." I answered, and she immediately started crying again. "Don't cry."
"I want Mama."
I wanted Mama too, but she wasn't here. I had no idea where she was.
"She'll be here soon. Let's just wait."
Slowly, she stopped crying. "I-I'm hungry."
We had no food left. I had eaten everything at lunch. By this time, Mama should have been home to feed us. But since she wasn't here, we had nothing to eat.
"I want to eat." she said.
I checked if there was any food left, even just bread, but there was none. I only had one option—to buy food outside. I took the coins left on the table. Ate Jamela had left them for me.
"I'll just buy some food. Stay here." I told her, and she nodded.
I ran out of the house. There was a food store near us. They sold viands, and sometimes, snacks.
"Ate, I'd like to buy something." I said to the vendor.
"What do you want?"
"Something for someone who's sick." I answered, and she laughed.
"Lugaw?" she asked.
I didn't know what that was, but I just nodded. She immediately grabbed a plastic bag and poured some into it. I handed her the payment before she gave me what I bought.
I ran back home, but as soon as I reached the gate, I saw Mama inside the house. I stopped near the door. She was holding a slipper.
She was going to hit me again.
"Where did you go?! Why did you leave Jay-jay again?! You're so stubborn!" she yelled at me and was about to strike.
I quickly stepped back, and it seemed to anger Mama even more.
"Do you really want to stay outside?! Fine! Sleep out there!" she shouted and slammed the door shut.
"Mama!" I screamed and knocked on the door repeatedly.
"Stay out there! Don't come in!" she yelled from inside.
I had to give Jay-jay his food. I could hear her crying and calling my name.
"Mama! I need to give something to Jay-jay."
"Be quiet!"
I stopped knocking and sat on the ground in front of the door. I hugged the food I bought for Jay. I didn't want to sleep outside, but I was afraid of being hit by Mama. The last time she hit me, even my face got hurt. It stung on my skin.
I rested my head against the side of the door. Mama had already turned off the lights inside and outside the house, making it completely dark. I lost track of time until even the neighboring houses turned off their lights.
Maybe Mama really didn't love me.
Jay-jay was taken to the hospital again. Mama left me with Ate Jamela because she said she couldn't take care of me there.
By lunchtime, Mama arrived to pick me up. When we got home, she immediately looked for a bag and started packing clothes into it. But she was packing my clothes.
"Where are we going, Mama?" I asked her.
"To your Lola. You'll stay with her for now." she answered without looking at me.
I didn't say anything. After packing, she pulled me out of the house. She was in such a hurry that she almost forgot to lock the door.
She hailed a tricycle and had it take us to a jeepney terminal. The streets we passed by were unfamiliar to me. I wanted to ask Mama, but I was afraid she would get mad.
As the jeepney moved, I kept looking out the window. We were getting farther and farther from home. I no longer knew where we were.
"Stop here!" Mama called out, and the jeepney halted.
She got off, and I followed. We walked toward a place and stopped in front of a large gate. It was tall, unlike ours, which was short.
I immediately saw Lola watering the plants. "Lola!" I called out, and she turned to us.
She greeted us with a smile. She took the bag Mama was carrying. They talked about something I couldn't understand.
"Aries." Mama called me and knelt to be at my level. "Stay here with your Lola for now. I just need to take care of Jay-jay."
I nodded at her. "You'll come back for me when Jay-jay gets better, right?"
She nodded too. "Of course! I'll come back for you."
She stood up and faced Lola again. She said a few more things before turning away and leaving. She would come back for me, so I wasn't scared.
Mama was taking too long. I had been here for so long, but she still hadn't come back for me. I didn't even know if Jay-jay was okay now.
"Why is Mama taking so long?" I asked the person beside me who was reading something. Lola said she was my aunt, but she always fought with me.
"I don't know. I'm not close to your mother to know." she replied.
That was always her answer to me. I was getting annoyed with her. Suddenly, a strong wind blew, and since we were sitting by the window, her hair flew into my face.
Her hair stank.
"Your hair!" I shouted at her.
"Breathe it in."
I was really annoyed, so I pulled her hair hard. I saw her surprise, and slowly, her face darkened. She quickly pinched my skin with two fingers as hard as she could. I screamed from the pain.
"Lola!" I cried out, followed by my tears.
"Lara! You made him cry again!" Lola called out angrily to my aunt.
"Your grandson is a brat!" she replied and moved away from me.
I was about to complain when we heard a car honking. I peeked out the window and saw a beautiful car parked in front of the gate. I saw my other aunts and uncles scrambling to open the gate. They were all smiling as if they were expecting someone from inside the car.
When the car stopped, the door opened, and a woman stepped out. She was beautiful and looked somewhat familiar to me.
"Tita, who is that?" I asked my aunt, who always seemed to be in a bad mood.
"Why don't you ask her?"
I really couldn't get any answers from her. She was always like that. I thought at first that we would get along, but she was mean to kids.
Not long after, the woman entered the house with a child following her.
"Here comes another pest," I heard my aunt mutter.
"Lara! How are you? You've grown up! How's school?" the woman asked my aunt with a smile.
"Ask our principal." she answered before turning around and walking into her room.
I was about to follow her, but I stopped when the child and the woman looked at me. It was clear that the child didn't know me, but even so, the woman still smiled at me.
"Hello..." she said, approaching me. "How are you? What's your name?"
"A-Aries."
"That's Jeana's son," said one of my aunts behind them.
The woman's expression changed for a moment but quickly returned to a smile.
"Why are you so thin?" the new child said. "I can easily break your bones."
I didn't understand what he said.
"Angelo. Don't talk to him like that." the woman scolded him.
She looked at me again and smiled. "I'm your Aunt Gema. I'm your Mama's sister."