Mapo Tofu with Minced Meat, Duck Blood with Scallions, Lamb with Cumin, Soy-Sauce Braised Chicken, Shredded Cabbage, Scrambled Eggs with Tomato and Chili, Loofah-Tomato-Egg Soup — 6 Dishes and 1 Soup!
"Mmm! It smells amazing! Brother, you're incredible!" Naruto stared at the dishes laid out on the dinner table, licking his lips before giving a big thumbs-up to the person next to him.
"Eat up, Naruto!" Menma replied warmly.
Hey! Naruto, did you just compliment the wrong person?! I'm the one who cooked this!!
Menma's clone, who had done all the cooking, shot a deadpan look at the real Menma sitting smugly nearby.
Tsunade wasted no time diving into the food, followed closely by Kakashi.
Just as Kakashi was about to start eating, Menma looked at him curiously. He suddenly realized—Wait... I've never seen Kakashi's real face before!
"What's wrong, Menma?" Kakashi asked, noticing his stare.
"Mr. Kakashi, I've always been curious—how do you even eat with that mask on?" Menma asked.
"Oh, simple. I just lift the mask," Kakashi said casually. Then he pulled down the mask to reveal an unexpectedly handsome face.
Huh, not bad. Handsome... but still not as handsome as me, Menma thought smugly.
Another great mystery of the Shinobi world—solved.
Across the table, Shizune caught sight of Kakashi's face and blushed immediately.
"Shizune," Menma leaned in with a grin, "Mr. Kakashi is still single, you know."
Shizune: (//▽//)
She blushed like a ripe tomato, sneaking another glance at Kakashi. He really is good-looking… but why is he still single?
"Ahem!" Kakashi quickly gulped down a glass of water, coughing. What the heck did this brat just say?!
"Don't be embarrassed, Kakashi-sensei! Being single isn't a crime," Menma said with faux sympathy.
"You brat! Watch your mouth!" Kakashi was getting visibly annoyed.
"Kakashi-sensei, you better hurry up and find someone. At this rate, even Naruto's gonna get married and have kids before you!" Menma teased.
Kakashi: "…"
"I mean, look at Lady Tsunade. She's not rushing either—why should I?"
Kakashi immediately slapped a hand over his mouth, realizing what he just said.
Menma nearly burst out laughing and gave Kakashi a big thumbs-up.
Wow. Man's got guts. Saying that in front of Tsunade? Brave.
Tsunade, mid-bite, froze. Slowly placing her chopsticks down, she stood up, glaring daggers at Kakashi.
"Kakashi… what did you just say?"
"I-I didn't say anything, Lady Tsunade!" Kakashi said quickly—and then bolted out of the house.
"You think you can run?!" Tsunade roared, chasing him down.
"Lady Tsunade!!" Shizune shouted in a panic.
Meanwhile, Naruto was completely unfazed by the chaos. He continued eating calmly.
His brother's cooking? Too good to waste time watching others get beat up.
Naruto kept piling food onto his plate. Once a picky eater, he'd been "educated" by Menma—and by educated, we mean "disciplined with a stick." Now, Naruto ate everything, just like a clean, well-fed little piglet.
At six years old, Naruto was already nearly 1.4 meters tall—half a head taller than Sasuke. Thanks to good nutrition, he looked vibrant, radiant, and healthier than ever. Fair-skinned, energetic, and bright, Naruto was like a little sun—warm, cheerful, and radiant.
Menma, although the same height, gave off a completely different vibe—like a cold moon. Quiet, distant, and cool.
Together, the sun and moon devoured almost every dish on the table.
By the time Tsunade returned—still fuming—the table was nearly empty.
"My food…?" Tsunade stared in disbelief at the clean plates.
"Sorry, Sister Tsunade," Menma said, trying not to laugh. "We finished it. Not our fault though—blame Kakashi!"
Tsunade: "KAKASHI!!!"
Her fists clenched, trembling with rage.
Should've hit him harder earlier...
Then she turned to Menma. "Fine. Make more. Now."
"Can't. Sorry, Tsunade. The fridge is empty." Menma smiled cheekily.
Hahaha. Even fate is helping me today.
Tsunade: "…"
She stomped her foot and disappeared in a blur of motion.
Menma smirked. Sorry, Kakashi-sensei... I'll mourn your loss for three minutes.
"Naruto, you're on dish duty," Menma said.
"Okay, brother!" Naruto jumped up with enthusiasm, forming a hand sign.
"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"
In a poof, four Naruto clones appeared.
"Alright, let's get cleaning!" Naruto and his team got to work.
Shizune watched the scene and couldn't help shaking her head. Shadow Clones... used for dishwashing? Really?
"Shizune, Kakashi's kind of handsome, isn't he?" Menma suddenly asked.
Handsome...?
Shizune thought back to that brief glimpse of Kakashi's real face and nodded unconsciously.
"If you like him, go for it! Men and women are separated by mountains, women and men by sheer gauze! Come on, Shizune—I believe in you!" Menma said with a grin.
Kakashi-sensei... this is as far as I can help you.
With that, Menma stood up and returned to his room to continue writing novels—for Kurama, who was now owed three more.
Inside Menma, Kurama smiled with satisfaction, watching his host so motivated.
Naruto, after finishing the dishes, didn't bother his brother. He had his own routine—homework, chores, and, of course, chatting with Kurama.
Naruto really wanted his Kurama to be just like his brother's—able to pop out at any moment.
Sensing Naruto's thoughts, Kurama in his body smirked and muttered, "Tch... I don't need your pity, brat."
The moment he said that, Naruto's consciousness appeared before him, smiling so brightly it nearly melted the ancient beast's heart.
"Nine Tails! Miss me?" Naruto grinned.
"Hmph. I don't miss you," Kurama turned his head away.
"But I missed you so much!" Naruto chirped.
Kurama: ╭(╯^╰)╮ ...This brat.
"What story do you want to hear today, Nine Tails?" Naruto asked. He had come prepared with a full list.
Kurama turned toward him. "Brat... just bring me some novels later."
And then... he blushed.
Kurama had gotten this idea recently. Or maybe it came from his other half. Either way, he found himself wanting to be outside like his counterpart. But every time he tried to push the seal, that yellow-haired menace—Minato—would show up and stop him.
So now, Kurama could only communicate through the seal and sulk.
How is this fair? My other half gets fresh novels every day, while I have to listen to this kid retell them secondhand? Unacceptable!
"But my brother has a lot of novels!" Naruto immediately began talking non-stop.
Kurama sighed deeply.
"Can someone please get me some tape... I need to seal this kid's mouth."
(End of Chapter)
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