"What do you think, Hunter Kwon Jihan?"
"What do I think? That this filthy and disgusting world deserves to be destroyed?"
"No, not that… do you think there are any remnants left?"
"There aren't any more here. They're probably nervously waiting outside."
"How are you so sure?"
"Because you, hyung, gave me the confidence. What are you talking about?"
Kwon Jihan stared at Yoon Seo quietly.
"It seems like the one most affected by the plan to instill distrust in Galaxaia is you, hyung. Maybe because you naturally don't trust people."
"…"
"Don't worry too much. The people here volunteered, fully prepared to sacrifice their lives for justice. They're not the type to be scared of remnants or to fall for such division tactics easily. As long as you stay strong, hyung, everything will be fine."
Yoon Seo felt his anxiety ease. At the same time, he found it somewhat amusing.
Kwon Jihan was far healthier—both physically and mentally—than Yoon Seo had expected. His convictions were strong, and he didn't get shaken by these things.
When the cultists talked about wrongful deaths, Kwon Jihan probably thought of his mother and his pet dogs too… yet, his strength in not showing it was admirable.
In fact, the poor child who was beaten by bullies that Yoon Seo had mentioned was actually Kwon Jihan. He surely knew that, but he didn't bring it up.
"And I know you deliberately changed the subject, hyung. Let's get back to my story."
"What story?"
"The one about not treating your life lightly."
Yoon Seo sighed.
"I'm not trying to side with those crazy bastards, but they didn't attempt suicide because they took their lives lightly. Ending your own life doesn't necessarily mean you undervalue it."
"Why do you want to die hyung?"
"…"
Yoon Seo sighed again, but this time it was a deeper, heavier sigh than before.
'And when I found out you were living because of those wills.'
Before entering the Great Dungeon, Kwon Jihan had clearly said it. He knew that once he finished all the last wills, he intended to die.
He hadn't said much more after that, so Yoon Seo left it alone. He didn't expect the topic to resurface here.
"I just don't understand. I don't get why you want to die, hyung. Is it because of guilt?"
"Guilt… something like that."
"Alright, think about it hyung."
Kwon Jihan gestured in the air as he explained.
"If the reason you want to die is guilt over your fallen comrades, shouldn't you be living instead? Because your fallen comrades didn't leave those outlandish last wills because they wanted you to die. They wanted Seo Chaeyoon to live… They desperately wanted you to live."
Kwon Jihan took a deep breath and continued.
"So, even in that critical moment, when they were about to breathe their last, they squeezed out the last bit of their strength to leave a will. Thinking, 'How can I make sure our youngest wants to live longer?' How many squats should they ask for so our youngest can live a healthy life? How many mountains should they have you climb for you to feel relieved? So, if it's guilt about your comrades, then you can't die, hyung. Right, Riceball?"
Beep.
Riceball responded loudly.
When Yoon Seo couldn't say anything, Kwon Jihan continued.
"If the reason you want to die is exhaustion from life… if you're just sick and tired of living, that's something else."
"That's right. I'm tired of life."
Yoon Seo answered promptly, and Kwon Jihan, as if waiting for this response, asked immediately.
"So, you want to find eternal rest and peace?"
"Rest? No, it's the opposite. I want to die to avoid becoming happy."
"…"
This time, Kwon Jihan fell silent. He looked as if he'd been struck.
"…That means you know, hyung, that living is the path to becoming happier."
Kwon Jihan's face contorted with anguish.
It seemed like Kwon Jihan was trying to convince Yoon Seo with words like, "You can't find rest and peace by dying; you have to be alive to get them."
Yoon Seo worried that Kwon Jihan might start crying. But instead of shedding tears, Kwon Jihan just took deep breaths before speaking.
"I want you to live, hyung… for a long, long time, happily. Without any suffering, enjoying all the pleasures of life. But to do that, I need to understand the real reason you want to die, and I just can't figure it out."
"…"
Yoon Seo had never really found some fundamental reason for wanting to die.
He wanted to die simply because he wanted to. He didn't want to live because he just didn't feel like it.
'There's nothing to look forward to in the future,' was a thought he dismissed from his mind. Honestly, these days, he had just a tiny bit of hope for the future.
'Living isn't fun,' was another thought he dismissed. If he were being honest, he still wanted to play 'Hunter and Skill.'
'The fundamental reason I want to die.'
Yoon Seo thought deeply.
If it were guilt over his fallen comrades, as Kwon Jihan suggested, then yes, he should continue living. After all, what they wanted was for Seo Chaeyoon to live.
But if you asked if he was seeking rest and peace, the answer was a definite no. Seo Chaeyoon didn't deserve rest and peace.
Yes, that's why he wanted to die.
"I don't deserve…"
"…"
"I don't deserve to live."
"Why?"
Kwon Jihan asked immediately. A look of confusion flickered in Yoon Seo's brown eyes.
"I don't know. It's just… at some point, I started thinking I had to die."
"…"
"Since the Great Dungeon, I've thought that once I've finished all the wills, I should die because I don't deserve to live."
"Why do you think you don't deserve to live?"
Kwon Jihan spoke in a somewhat murky voice. It wasn't directed at Yoon Seo—it sounded more like he was talking to himself.
Kwon Jihan was deep in thought, and Yoon Seo also sank into his own thoughts. There was a strange feeling he couldn't quite put into words—a subtle discomfort when he thought about the reasons for wanting to die. It wasn't something as simple as saying, 'because of the horrible things that happened in the Great Dungeon.'
Beep.
Riceball cried out, asking for attention, and though Yoon Seo wasn't really in the mood, he was about to play with it using his fingers. But Kwon Jihan's hand moved first. Riceball fluttered its wings, playing with Kwon Jihan.
"Our little one has no sense of the mood."
Kwon Jihan's voice had lightened up a bit, and Yoon Seo felt relieved inside.
"Hyung, did anyone leave a will telling you not to get into a relationship?"
"Why are you bringing this up all of a sudden?"
"I'm just really worried. Please answer me."
Looking at Kwon Jihan's handsome face, Yoon Seo answered reluctantly.
"There was no such will."
"Good. You seem a bit unstable, so I think you should meet a mentally strong younger guy."
"What nonsense is this?"
"A super strong ability user who fits your ideal type, someone mentally tough enough that you could lean on them, a trustworthy younger man."
"…"
"Wow, it's really hard to find someone like that. Could such a person even exist in this world? Hyung, if someone like that appears in front of you, don't let them go. They'd be the only one in the entire universe. Maybe they're already circling around you, so look nearby. Anyway, there's only one person like that in the world."
Kwon Jihan kept rambling with a fake serious expression.
Yoon Seo's face started to turn red.
Then, as if he suddenly remembered, Kwon Jihan asked.
"By the way, hyung… when and how did you realize you were okay with guys too?"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"Well, whatever. Hyung has lived a long time, so I guess a lot has happened."
Yoon Seo was about to argue that he wasn't that old but closed his mouth when he saw Kwon Jihan's expression. His face was on the edge of irritation and indifference, yet even in this moment, the way his lips pouted slightly was cute.
Yoon Seo thought it'd be awkward if this mood continued, but luckily it didn't last long.
"Ah. The
"Let's go."
The
It was time to hunt the boss monster.
As planned, Kwon Jihan and Yoon Seo headed toward the boss's location, while the others began moving toward the swamp's perimeter.
While flying towards the boss, Yoon Seo glanced at Kwon Jihan. Kwon Jihan noticed immediately and looked back at Yoon Seo.
"What? Don't worry about the boss. I'm strong enough for you to rely on me. I'm also younger."
Kwon Jihan, continuing the earlier joke, made Yoon Seo shake his head in disbelief.
In truth, while talking with Kwon Jihan about the reasons for wanting to die, one scene had flashed through Yoon Seo's mind.
Lee Domin.
A vision not present in his memory.
In that vision, Lee Domin, dying, was glaring at Yoon Seo with eyes full of rage, spitting out curses dripping with hatred.
Looking at him, Yoon Seo thought,
'I must die when I leave the Great Dungeon.'
'I don't deserve to live.'
Nothing like this had happened in the Great Dungeon. Yoon Seo wasn't even there when Lee Domin died.
So what was that scene?
Why did he think he had to die for Domin?
His heart churned with unease.
***
20. Trauma
In the final battle of the Lava Zone, Kwon Jihan, wrapped in the golden magic of
When the boss monster spewed flames or swung its massive tail, Kwon Jihan didn't dodge or block; he clashed with his sword, counterattacking. He charged through the flames, thrusting his sword into the monster's maw, and when its tail, swinging at tremendous speed, created shockwaves, he met it with an equally fast and powerful slash. Every strike was precise, without a single wasted movement, all critical hits. Unlike the playful tone he used when bantering with Yoon Seo, his cold, deadly focus as he threw himself into the flames didn't appear reckless or worrisome. Of course, the confidence in his attacks likely stemmed from Seo Chaeyoon's shield, but even accounting for that, his performance was awe-inspiring.
"What do you think, Hunter Kwon Jihan?"
"What do I think? That this filthy and disgusting world deserves to be destroyed?"
"No, not that… do you think there are any remnants left?"
"There aren't any more here. They're probably nervously waiting outside."
"How are you so sure?"
"Because you, hyung, gave me the confidence. What are you talking about?"
Kwon Jihan stared at Yoon Seo quietly.
"It seems like the one most affected by the plan to instill distrust in Galaxaia is you, hyung. Maybe because you naturally don't trust people."
"…"
"Don't worry too much. The people here volunteered, fully prepared to sacrifice their lives for justice. They're not the type to be scared of remnants or to fall for such division tactics easily. As long as you stay strong, hyung, everything will be fine."
Yoon Seo felt his anxiety ease. At the same time, he found it somewhat amusing.
Kwon Jihan was far healthier—both physically and mentally—than Yoon Seo had expected. His convictions were strong, and he didn't get shaken by these things.
When the cultists talked about wrongful deaths, Kwon Jihan probably thought of his mother and his pet dogs too… yet, his strength in not showing it was admirable.
In fact, the poor child who was beaten by bullies that Yoon Seo had mentioned was actually Kwon Jihan. He surely knew that, but he didn't bring it up.
"And I know you deliberately changed the subject, hyung. Let's get back to my story."
"What story?"
"The one about not treating your life lightly."
Yoon Seo sighed.
"I'm not trying to side with those crazy bastards, but they didn't attempt suicide because they took their lives lightly. Ending your own life doesn't necessarily mean you undervalue it."
"Why do you want to die hyung?"
"…"
Yoon Seo sighed again, but this time it was a deeper, heavier sigh than before.
'And when I found out you were living because of those wills.'
Before entering the Great Dungeon, Kwon Jihan had clearly said it. He knew that once he finished all the last wills, he intended to die.
He hadn't said much more after that, so Yoon Seo left it alone. He didn't expect the topic to resurface here.
"I just don't understand. I don't get why you want to die, hyung. Is it because of guilt?"
"Guilt… something like that."
"Alright, think about it hyung."
Kwon Jihan gestured in the air as he explained.
"If the reason you want to die is guilt over your fallen comrades, shouldn't you be living instead? Because your fallen comrades didn't leave those outlandish last wills because they wanted you to die. They wanted Seo Chaeyoon to live… They desperately wanted you to live."
Kwon Jihan took a deep breath and continued.
"So, even in that critical moment, when they were about to breathe their last, they squeezed out the last bit of their strength to leave a will. Thinking, 'How can I make sure our youngest wants to live longer?' How many squats should they ask for so our youngest can live a healthy life? How many mountains should they have you climb for you to feel relieved? So, if it's guilt about your comrades, then you can't die, hyung. Right, Riceball?"
Beep.
Riceball responded loudly.
When Yoon Seo couldn't say anything, Kwon Jihan continued.
"If the reason you want to die is exhaustion from life… if you're just sick and tired of living, that's something else."
"That's right. I'm tired of life."
Yoon Seo answered promptly, and Kwon Jihan, as if waiting for this response, asked immediately.
"So, you want to find eternal rest and peace?"
"Rest? No, it's the opposite. I want to die to avoid becoming happy."
"…"
This time, Kwon Jihan fell silent. He looked as if he'd been struck.
"…That means you know, hyung, that living is the path to becoming happier."
Kwon Jihan's face contorted with anguish.
It seemed like Kwon Jihan was trying to convince Yoon Seo with words like, "You can't find rest and peace by dying; you have to be alive to get them."
Yoon Seo worried that Kwon Jihan might start crying. But instead of shedding tears, Kwon Jihan just took deep breaths before speaking.
"I want you to live, hyung… for a long, long time, happily. Without any suffering, enjoying all the pleasures of life. But to do that, I need to understand the real reason you want to die, and I just can't figure it out."
"…"
Yoon Seo had never really found some fundamental reason for wanting to die.
He wanted to die simply because he wanted to. He didn't want to live because he just didn't feel like it.
'There's nothing to look forward to in the future,' was a thought he dismissed from his mind. Honestly, these days, he had just a tiny bit of hope for the future.
'Living isn't fun,' was another thought he dismissed. If he were being honest, he still wanted to play 'Hunter and Skill.'
'The fundamental reason I want to die.'
Yoon Seo thought deeply.
If it were guilt over his fallen comrades, as Kwon Jihan suggested, then yes, he should continue living. After all, what they wanted was for Seo Chaeyoon to live.
But if you asked if he was seeking rest and peace, the answer was a definite no. Seo Chaeyoon didn't deserve rest and peace.
Yes, that's why he wanted to die.
"I don't deserve…"
"…"
"I don't deserve to live."
"Why?"
Kwon Jihan asked immediately. A look of confusion flickered in Yoon Seo's brown eyes.
"I don't know. It's just… at some point, I started thinking I had to die."
"…"
"Since the Great Dungeon, I've thought that once I've finished all the wills, I should die because I don't deserve to live."
"Why do you think you don't deserve to live?"
Kwon Jihan spoke in a somewhat murky voice. It wasn't directed at Yoon Seo—it sounded more like he was talking to himself.
Kwon Jihan was deep in thought, and Yoon Seo also sank into his own thoughts. There was a strange feeling he couldn't quite put into words—a subtle discomfort when he thought about the reasons for wanting to die. It wasn't something as simple as saying, 'because of the horrible things that happened in the Great Dungeon.'
Beep.
Riceball cried out, asking for attention, and though Yoon Seo wasn't really in the mood, he was about to play with it using his fingers. But Kwon Jihan's hand moved first. Riceball fluttered its wings, playing with Kwon Jihan.
"Our little one has no sense of the mood."
Kwon Jihan's voice had lightened up a bit, and Yoon Seo felt relieved inside.
"Hyung, did anyone leave a will telling you not to get into a relationship?"
"Why are you bringing this up all of a sudden?"
"I'm just really worried. Please answer me."
Looking at Kwon Jihan's handsome face, Yoon Seo answered reluctantly.
"There was no such will."
"Good. You seem a bit unstable, so I think you should meet a mentally strong younger guy."
"What nonsense is this?"
"A super strong ability user who fits your ideal type, someone mentally tough enough that you could lean on them, a trustworthy younger man."
"…"
"Wow, it's really hard to find someone like that. Could such a person even exist in this world? Hyung, if someone like that appears in front of you, don't let them go. They'd be the only one in the entire universe. Maybe they're already circling around you, so look nearby. Anyway, there's only one person like that in the world."
Kwon Jihan kept rambling with a fake serious expression.
Yoon Seo's face started to turn red.
Then, as if he suddenly remembered, Kwon Jihan asked.
"By the way, hyung… when and how did you realize you were okay with guys too?"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"Well, whatever. Hyung has lived a long time, so I guess a lot has happened."
Yoon Seo was about to argue that he wasn't that old but closed his mouth when he saw Kwon Jihan's expression. His face was on the edge of irritation and indifference, yet even in this moment, the way his lips pouted slightly was cute.
Yoon Seo thought it'd be awkward if this mood continued, but luckily it didn't last long.
"Ah. The
"Let's go."
The
It was time to hunt the boss monster.
As planned, Kwon Jihan and Yoon Seo headed toward the boss's location, while the others began moving toward the swamp's perimeter.
While flying towards the boss, Yoon Seo glanced at Kwon Jihan. Kwon Jihan noticed immediately and looked back at Yoon Seo.
"What? Don't worry about the boss. I'm strong enough for you to rely on me. I'm also younger."
Kwon Jihan, continuing the earlier joke, made Yoon Seo shake his head in disbelief.
In truth, while talking with Kwon Jihan about the reasons for wanting to die, one scene had flashed through Yoon Seo's mind.
Lee Domin.
A vision not present in his memory.
In that vision, Lee Domin, dying, was glaring at Yoon Seo with eyes full of rage, spitting out curses dripping with hatred.
Looking at him, Yoon Seo thought,
'I must die when I leave the Great Dungeon.'
'I don't deserve to live.'
Nothing like this had happened in the Great Dungeon. Yoon Seo wasn't even there when Lee Domin died.
So what was that scene?
Why did he think he had to die for Domin?
His heart churned with unease.
***
20. Trauma
In the final battle of the Lava Zone, Kwon Jihan, wrapped in the golden magic of
When the boss monster spewed flames or swung its massive tail, Kwon Jihan didn't dodge or block; he clashed with his sword, counterattacking. He charged through the flames, thrusting his sword into the monster's maw, and when its tail, swinging at tremendous speed, created shockwaves, he met it with an equally fast and powerful slash. Every strike was precise, without a single wasted movement, all critical hits. Unlike the playful tone he used when bantering with Yoon Seo, his cold, deadly focus as he threw himself into the flames didn't appear reckless or worrisome. Of course, the confidence in his attacks likely stemmed from Seo Chaeyoon's shield, but even accounting for that, his performance was awe-inspiring.