I spent the rest of the evening doing the most mature, level-headed thing possible—hiding. And by hiding, I mean aggressively avoiding Theo like he was a contagious disease wrapped in a muscle tank.
I kept to my side of the cabin—because apparently, we had sides now. I claimed the left bedroom, which I decided was superior because it had a slightly larger closet. Victory. Small, petty victory. I wasn't about to share a square inch more than necessary with Theo "I'm-Too-Smooth-for-My-Own-Good".
For a while, I thought I'd gotten lucky. I didn't hear him after I shut myself in my room, and the only sound was the hum of the air conditioner struggling against the summer heat. I showered, changed into the most unflattering pajamas I owned—a baggy T-shirt with a cat that said "Not Today, Satan"—and prepared myself for a peaceful, Theo-free night.
That dream shattered about an hour later.
I emerged from my room to grab a bottle of water, confident he'd retreated to his side. But as soon as I rounded the corner to the kitchen, I walked straight into a very shirtless, very smug Theo.
Because of course. Of course he was shirtless.
"Well, if it isn't my favorite roommate," he drawled, leaning against the fridge like he was posing for a low-budget cologne ad.
I refused to look at his abs. I was stronger than that.
"Relax. I'm just here for water," I said, casually opening the fridge like I wasn't internally spiraling.
"Sure," he said, his voice dripping with mock innocence. "You seemed pretty eager to avoid me earlier. What happened? Miss me already?"
I snorted, grabbing a bottle and shutting the door with more force than necessary. "Yeah, Theo. I missed you the same way people miss food poisoning."
His grin only widened. "Ouch. Your words wound me, Lex."
I didn't stick around for his charm offensive. Instead, I spun on my heel and walked back to my room with the grace of someone who definitely wasn't bothered.
"Goodnight, sweetheart," he called after me, laughing softly.
I slammed my door shut. Childish? Maybe. But if Theo thought he was going to charm his way under my skin again, he had another thing coming.
***
The first thing I heard was the trumpet.
Not just any trumpet — no. This was the kind of trumpet they warn you about in church. The "end of the world is here, pack your bags for the afterlife" kind.
Half asleep, I shot up in bed, eyes wide, heart racing. "No, no, no, it's too early for the world to end," I mumbled, throwing off my blanket like it was cursed. "Please, God, I haven't even pursued my career as a lawyer."
Another loud blast shook the cabin, and in my panic, I tried to stand but got tangled in the sheets. My foot slipped, my body followed, and I crashed to the floor like a sack of potatoes, smacking my head on the way down.
"Owwwww," I groaned, lying there for a second, still half convinced the sky outside was probably on fire.
I rubbed my head as I slowly peeled myself off the floor.
I shuffled to the window to see what was happening outside, praying I wouldn't see the Four Horsemen.
Instead, I saw something almost worse: the same lady who refused to let me change my cabin...in a green hat, green coat, green shorts and green boots. Still blowing the goddamn trumpet
She looked like a Crocodile Dundee...and that was being nice.
I had planned on sneaking out early to avoid Theo but I guess the universe had different plans because the moment I stepped out of my room...I bumped into something solid.
Someone solid.
Please be a hallway ghost
Are ghosts even solid?
I blinked up — way up — to find Theo. Dressed. Fresh. Holding some obnoxiously large, neon-colored energy drink
"Wow, eager to see me first thing, Lex? You really can't get enough," he smirked.
"Please," I scoffed. "I'd rather hug a cactus."
"Kinky," he quipped without missing a beat, his grin sharp enough to cut glass.
I rolled my eyes and brushed past him, trying to ignore the fact that his stupid morning hair somehow made him look even better. Unfair. "I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."
"Aw, you're no fun," he called after me. "But don't worry—I'll grow on you."
"Like a rash," I muttered under my breath.
***
Sometimes, all you need to feel better is a shower, a nice outfit, and the bright sun lighting up your day. I had escaped Cabin 14 a.k.a The sweetlodge of suffering and was now heading for the camp's dining hall.
I had dressed in a pair of white shorts and a black basketball vest and put my hair in a messy ponytail, but it did the job of upping my confidence. I hummed my way through the now quiet campground since everyone was already having breakfast.
Maybe this place isn't so bad after all.
But then it hit me..
The noise... before I even entered the dining hall. The kids were running around, screaming, and the coaches were trying and horribly failing to keep order. Food trays were crashing like cymbals in a very unmusical orchestra. Absolute chaos.
"Perfect."
Grumbling under my breath, I grabbed a tray and forced myself through the breakfast line. I went for the safest option: burnt toast and a suspiciously dark cup of coffee.
I scanned the room for a place to settle and eat my breakfast of doom. I spotted the best place — an empty table shoved into the farthest, darkest corner of the hall. I power-walked over like my sanity depended on it and slid into the seat with a dramatic sigh.
Maybe, just maybe, if I was quiet enough, no one would notice me and I might just survive camp.
That hope lasted all of three seconds.
I felt it before I saw it — the unmistakable presence of someone settling way too close. Slowly, like in a horror movie, I turned my head.
Theo.
Of course, it was Theo.
With his stupid, messy hair that somehow still fell perfectly into place. Annoyingly perfect. And there he was, sliding into the seat next to me like he owned the place.
"Just because we're roommates doesn't mean you have to follow me everywhere."
"See?" he teased, "Knew you'd miss me."
Before I could bite back with something appropriately scathing, chaos found me. Literally.
A kid — sprinting like his life depended on it — rammed full-force into my side. My tray jerked. My cup of coffee? Oh, it didn't just spill. It exploded. Right down the front of my vest.
"Are you kidding me?!" I shot up, staring in horror at the giant, steaming stain spreading across my clothes.
The kid gasped, face pale with panic. "I'm so, so sorry!" He scrambled to hand me a wad of napkins, which did absolutely nothing to help.
And then, the final nail in my sanity's coffin.
The kid looked between me and Theo, his face lighting up with childish innocence. "Is that your boyfriend?"
I froze.
And Theo? Oh, he laughed.
Loudly.
"See?" Theo said, smirking as he reached over to help dab at my vest — not that it helped. "Even the kids can feel the chemistry."
I gawked at him, horrified. "He is not my boyfriend!" I snapped, snatching the napkins from the poor kid. My cheeks burned hotter than the coffee soaking my shirt.
Theo just leaned back in his chair, still grinning like the devil himself. "Sure, Lex. Keep telling yourself that."