As a demon duke, Banir had a dream.
He wanted to create the most challenging dungeon in history, a dungeon so formidable that countless self-assured warriors would line up to challenge it. Drawn by the promise of treasure, they would face failure after failure, only to rise again and try once more, only to fail again…
At the dungeon's deepest level, they would finally confront Banir himself as the final boss. After surviving near-impossible odds and exhausting every ounce of their strength and wit, they would triumphantly open the treasure chest behind him, driven by anticipation and desire.
And they would find… nothing but a crumpled piece of paper with a taunting message written on it.
Banir was convinced this would allow him to savor the most exquisite negative emotions—the ultimate disappointment and resentment in their purest form.
But to bring this dream to life and build his ideal dungeon, he first needed money. A lot of money.
Thus, Banir approached his old friend Wiz. Years ago, it was Banir who had helped Wiz become a lich so she could avenge her fallen comrades. Hearing that Wiz had opened a magic item shop, Banir decided to use the shop's profits to fund his dungeon project.
However…
"I'm starting to regret that decision…"
After inspecting Wiz's latest batch of inventory, Banir was horrified to find that every single item was unsellable junk.
In fact, selling refrigerators to Eskimos or fans to Russians would likely be easier than getting rid of these items.
"Wiz! Wiz! There's still one last item I haven't shown you yet!" Wiz said enthusiastically.
"There's no need to show me anything else. I already know it's trash. How foolish of me to have even a sliver of hope," Banir groaned, massaging his temples as if trying to stave off a headache—an impressive feat for someone with a body made of clay.
"Banir-sama! Just trust me this one last time! I have a feeling this one will definitely sell!" Wiz said, undeterred.
"And you've said that about every single item so far," Banir retorted, his tone flat.
But Wiz remained undaunted. With excitement, she presented the final magic tool.
"Banir-sama, this magic item is amazing! It allows communication across vast distances! If I speak into this tube-shaped device, the words will be perfectly transmitted to this small box, no matter how far away the other person is—even if they're on the other side of the kingdom!"
"Hmm? Isn't that just a telephone?" Banir asked, momentarily intrigued.
As a demon with clairvoyance, Banir was familiar with Kazuma's world and immediately recognized the concept of a telephone.
"A telephone? What's that?" Wiz tilted her head, puzzled.
"Never mind. Just tell me—does it have any side effects? If they're not too severe, it might actually sell."
"Really?! You think it'll sell?! That's great! I knew my inventory wasn't hopeless!" Wiz exclaimed, nearly in tears from excitement.
"I said it depends on the side effects! Don't start celebrating prematurely!" Banir snapped, smacking Wiz on the head hard enough to almost make her cry.
"Don't worry! The side effect is minor!" Wiz declared with confidence, puffing out her chest and tilting her chin up proudly. "The only issue is… the small box's sound will be loud enough for the entire town to hear."
The moment she finished speaking, a heavy silence fell over the shop. It was as if a dark cloud had descended, suffocating the atmosphere.
The stillness was broken only by Banir's furious yell:
"Trash!"
"Why?!"
"You're seriously asking why?! I thought you had brought in a telephone, but it turns out it's just a giant loudspeaker! Who in their right mind would buy something like this?!" Banir shouted.
But mid-rant, Banir suddenly froze. Sweat began to pour down his face in large droplets.
"Banir-sama? You look pale. Is your stomach upset? Did you eat something bad? I have a magic potion that cleanses the digestive system! It's very effective—it'll make your stomach healthier than ever! The only side effect is that all the toxins will come out of your mouth, but health is what really matters, right?"
"You fool!" Banir roared, smacking Wiz again.
Though she felt wronged, Wiz didn't dare argue further, seeing the grim look on Banir's face. She simply pursed her lips and watched as he clutched his head and muttered to himself.
"Curse it! This hopeless shopkeeper is a master at causing problems! Does she not realize how catastrophic this magic tool could be? If humanity goes extinct because of this, how am I supposed to achieve my dream? Who even made this thing? Do they have any idea what they've unleashed on the world?"
"It has to be destroyed. This disaster-waiting-to-happen must be destroyed before that idiot returns from the capital. No, destroying it isn't enough—the person who created it is a menace, too. They can't be left alone…"
Banir, the feared demon duke, now looked like a tragic hero as he wracked his brain for a way to save the world.
Just then, the shop door burst open. The bell hanging above it jingled cheerfully, announcing the arrival of a customer.
And with the bell came a voice so spirited it made Banir flinch—the very last voice he wanted to hear at that moment.
"Behold! Like the goddess Venus herself, a radiant and beautiful maiden has arrived! It is I—Nero! Banir, I have business with you!"
As Nero stepped inside, she was greeted by the sight of Wiz, teary-eyed and pitiful, and Banir, standing stiffly with his hands clasped behind his back, looking as if he'd been turned to stone.
"Ah, perfect! Both Banir and Wiz are here," Nero said with satisfaction.
"Hahahaha! What a fortuitous day! No wonder I heard magpies chirping this morning—it must have been to celebrate your arrival, Nero. Your presence truly graces this humble shop," Banir said, his voice strained.
Magpies? They have those in this world? Nero tilted her head, perplexed.
"By the way, what's going on here? Did you just get new stock? There's so much junk lying around there's barely any space to stand," Nero remarked, glancing around the cluttered shop.
"Ah… forgive our lack of hospitality. It's nothing of value—just trash this blind shopkeeper decided to buy. I'm planning to return it all immediately," Banir replied curtly.