AN UNEXPECTED GIFT
When I woke up, Sydney was no longer beside me. Even Judy is not there too. I was left in the bedroom all alone.
I decided to get out of bed and took small but quick strides towards the bathroom so I can take a quick shower, but the whole time I was in there—all that I can think of are the things that happened last night. Technically, I don't remember anything. After that drink…everything went black and the next thing I knew is that I'm lying beside him. I don't remember the thing that we did, but I can feel it and I definitely regret it.
I lowered my head as I started to tear up again. I've been crying the whole night so I thought I'm all out of tears...but here am I again—can't help but cry as I clean myself.
How did this happen to me? I keep on asking myself. I tried to do everything that I know is right. I obeyed my parents. I didn't do anything that is against their rules. But what came of me? I mistakenly got drunk and screwed myself up.
When I came down to the dining room, everyone's already there. The food's been served and everyone's already eating. When I entered the room, everyone's gaze darted on me.
"An!" called Judy as she approached me. "I'm so sorry if I didn't wake you up. You seem sound asleep so I left you to rest a bit," she added, smiling. I heave a sigh as I forced a smile, but that smile faded when I realized that the only vacant chair in the table is right next to Tuff.
What the heck!
I hesitated. I don't want to sit beside him but if I tried to avoid him my friends will definitely find it strange. And I don't want to explain to them why I'm avoiding him. I've already decided not to tell them. Tuff told me that I should forget everything that has happened, so I will try my best to forget it and not telling them should be the first step.
With a deep breathe I sat beside him—trying not to flinch or act strangely. I should act normal—as if everything is okay.
"Are you okay?" I heard someone ask so I look up and found out that Tyca's the one who asked that. But I frowned when I realized that everyone's looking at me—well, except for Tuff who's been looking down the whole time.
"W-What? Err…yes, I'm fine," I answered and they all smiled after hearing my answer.
"Oh right! What time did you came back to our room?"
I froze when Sydney asked that. I gulp as I took a quick glance at Tuff who also flinched after hearing the question. I look down at my food—looking at it intently as if it's the most amazing thing in the world.
"Err…" I started but Sydney cut me off.
"I'm really sorry if we left you at the study room. I told the gang that I'll be heading out first since I'm really sleepy. I want to bring you too but Judy insisted that she'll bring you herself instead."
My heart skipped a bit when she said that.
"Oh! You are right. Sorry Anrie. It's really Jay's fault. He got drunk and asked me to bring him to their room. I came back to take Tyca, but after I brought her I didn't expect that I'll be knocked out," said Judy, apologetically.
"Did Tuff bring you instead?" I stopped—really surprised with Tyca's question. I glance at Tuff, which I realized was also looking at me. He tried to say something but I cut him off before he can even say anything.
"No," I answered, full of conviction. "I went back myself," I continued. I immediately look back and darted my eyes at Tyca instead.
"Oh…" she said. And I can feel that she's confused about my answer and that made me really nervous.
Is she seeing through my lies? Did she notice anything? That's what keeps on playing in my head. And I really hope it's not.
My heart started to beat so fast but when Tyca continued to eat and took her attention away from us...that's when I felt relief. I guess she didn't notice anything.
We continued to eat, but I noticed Tuff peering at me and I can't help but to feel disgusted. He's really a jerk and just thinking about him makes me really mad.
But still, I can't help but to get worried. What will I do if—if—aahh! I really don't want to think about it. I just hope that it will not happen, because if it is…I am definitely screwed—big time.
• • •
We finished our book report after lunch and we went home in the afternoon. We finished everything we need to do and our book report is ready for submission tomorrow.
After coming home, I went straight to my bedroom—took one book in my shelf and started reading. I don't know if it can help but I hope it can take all away those bad memories I had even just for a minute. My brain will definitely explode if I don't find a way to distract myself.
"Anrie," my brother called. And without knocking...he opened the door of my room. I looked at him and gave him a smile even though I really don't want to smile right now. "How was it?" he asked as he approached me.
"We finished it," I simply said and returned my gaze to the book I'm reading—well, holding. I'm not really sure if I'm really actually reading it.
"That's good. Come, let's watch a movie together." He took the book I was holding and laid it aside. "Put that book aside. You've been working on your book report the whole weekend, and now…you're going to read another book?" he joked as he pulled me up. "Come on!"
"But..." I tried to reason out, but he looks determine so I finally gave up. "All right."
I let him dragged me as we both left my room and went to the living room. My brother took care of the TV and I headed straight to the sofa and sat down—quietly. A bowl of popcorn is sitting in the coffee table so I took a handful of it and started eating. I was enjoying myself with the popcorn when I suddenly I remembered everything that have happened yesterday.
I bit my lower lip because of frustration. I really hate this. It really keeps on bothering me no matter what I do. I want to forget it, but sucks…it keeps on popping on my head.
I took a deep breath and glance at Daniel who's still busy setting up the movie.
Should I tell him what happened?
I really want to talk to someone—to ask some advice, to comfort me. But I'm scared. My parents will definitely get angry if they found out and I don't want them to.
"This is it!" Daniel announced as he hit a button at the remote and the movie started playing. He walks towards me and sat beside me.
I took another glance at him which he noticed instantly. He looks at me and gave me a confused look. "What's wrong?" he asked. I breathe deeply as I opened my mouth to answer but I closed it again and shook my head.
"Nothing!" I answered. "Let's just watch the movie."
He look at me intently—trying to figure out what's running on my head but he then nodded eventually in response to what I said. He darted his eyes at the television and focused on the movie. I heave another sigh.
Let's just keep it Anrie. You don't have to tell them.
• • •
A month had passed but I still couldn't tell anyone what had happened. Well, I'm determine not to tell anyone.
How about Tuff? Well, I always see him at school and nothing changed about him. He is still that smart student in our class who always tops every activity. He seems to have forgotten everything that happened that day. And now I'm hundred percent sure that he's a complete jerk.
Me? No matter what I do, I can't really forget about that day. Technically, I don't remember what happened that night, but the thought that something happened to us—I just can't forget about that.
I also don't know if anything has changed. I tried to be the same but I really do think that something has changed with me. I don't really know but I can feel it.
I'm still the friendly girl who is everyone's friend. But you can rarely see me with a guy right now. Since that day, I tried to distance myself from guys. I'm scared, not entirely with the guys… but to what they can do.
I don't want that to happen again—that night between me and Tuff.
"An, let's go have some lunch," Sydney invited and I nodded.
"Yeah, sure." I grabbed my bag and followed them. We headed straight to the canteens along with Judy, Sydney, Racky, and Gill. We eat here often because the foods here are delicious.
We occupied one vacant table in the back part of the canteen. It is a long table that can fit about ten or more people. After ordering our food, we then started eating.
I was about to take a bite from the pizza I order when I smelled something really-really bad. I lowered my spoon and immediately covered my mouth and nose.
What is that? It stinks! I silently complained. But I think everyone noticed the disgust in my face.
"An, are you okay?" Sydney asked and as I look at her I found out that everyone's looking at me and they are all giving me this weird look.
I frowned as I rub my nose.
"Do you smell that?" I cover my mouth and nose since the smell is starting give me nausea.
"What smell?" they asked and everyone started to smell—trying to find what I smelled.
"Stinky!" I complained.
I really can't take the smell. It's making my stomach twist—and if I keep on smelling this…I'll definitely threw up.
"What? But I don't smell anything." They tried to smell again but all just shook they head and agreed.
"There's nothing," Gill said.
"N-Nothing?" I asked—really confused. But I really smelled something foul.
I tried to uncover my mouth and nose to check it but it's still there so I covered them again. The smell is really bad…like a food that's gone bad.
"You're acting like you're pregnant. Your senses are really delicate…" said Racky that made me froze.
P-Pregnant? I'm pregnant?
My chest started to pound so loud that I can even feel my whole system shaking.
"Uhm ... maybe I'm just not feeling well," I said—somehow convinving myself that Racky's statement isn't true. I uncovered my mouth and nose, and continued eating. The smell is really bad and it's making me nauseous—I can evel feel like puking any second now but I endured it.
The whole time that we're eating; I can't help but to get worried. So, when we got back to our classroom…I took my phone right away and looked at the calendar. I haven't had my period for a month now. Don't tell me…am I really pregnant? No way!
• • •
I'm really afraid about the fact that I'm pregnant. I tried to ignore it at first and just continue to do what I used to do. But I did observe myself for the next following days.
The next day I was almost late for school because I woke up so late. I ignored my alarm clock that I set at 5:30 in the morning and got up at 7 am instead. It only took me an hour to get ready and go to school, so I got really tired when I arrived.
"Are you ok An?" Sydney asked as I sat down beside her. I nodded in response eventhough I'm really sleepy.
"You're almost late today...that's not like you. What did you do last night and woke up so late today?"
I heave a sigh and shrugged. "I really don't know. I went to bed early last night to get enough sleep but I still woke up late," I answered. Sydney nodded but didn't ask anymore questions so we became quite.
But suddenly, I felt a sudden twisting in my stomach. I had to cover my mouth with my hands especially when I felt like throwing up. My stomach started to aches as if something is squeezing it inside. I immediately stood up—still covering my mouth with my hand.
"An, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Sydney asked but I was not able to answer her.
When I really wanted to throw up…I immediately run towards the girl's comfort room. I even stopped at the door when I almost bumped at Tuff who's about to enter the classroom. He immediately furrowed his forehead when he saw my face.
"Are you ok?" he asked but I ignored him and went my way to the comfort room.
"An!" I heard Sydney called but I didn't look back. I quickly entered a cubicle and began throwing up in the toilet. I even heard Sydney's footsteps and voice who seems to have followed me here. "An, what did you eat for you to throw up like this?" she asked as she started massaging my back, but I was not able to answer her since I kept on throwing up.
I don't feel really good. My stomach aches a lot and I'm really dizzy. It's like everything is spinning.
When I felt a little bit okay I decided to go outside. Sydney followed me?still supporting me from behind.
"Are you okay?" I heard someone said and when I look up…I saw Patrick.
"Pat!" I called, really surprised to see him here. He was standing outside—leaning at the wall when Sydney and I walk out from the comfort room.
"Here, I brought you water." He handed me a bottle of mineral water which I immediately accepted.
"Thank you Pat," I said, smiling. I am really touched with this gesture of his. We have a class and he's supposed to be there, but he's here instead. That's really kind of him.
I gave the two of them another smile before I went back to the comfort room to rinse my mouth. When I finished, the three of us went back together to our classroom. When we entered the room, Mrs. Robles; our professor for Advance Calculus is already there
"Ms. Lee, your classmates said you aren't feeling well?"
"I'm okay Mrs. Robles," I lied. It's not necessary for her to know about this. And, I'm starting to feel better…there's no need for me to go to the clinic.
"You better head to the clinic Miss Lee and take some rest. Don't worry; I'll excuse you for the day," she said and that really made me uncomfortable.
I really want to decline. I don't want to skip our lecture but if I stay here…I'll probably bother everyone. I'm even bothering them now since Mrs. Robles' taking her time talking to me instead of teaching. So, with a heavy heart…I decide to just accept her offer.
"Yes ma'am," I took my things and was about to go outside when Mrs. Robles said another thing that really startled me.
"Mr. Ricks, can you escort Ms. Lee to the clinic?"
I looked at her in disbelief. Did she just ask that man to accompany me?
I furrowed my forehead and heave a deep breath. "It's not necessary Mrs. Robles. I can handle myself," I assured her. It's not like I can't walk for him to escort me. And why the heck did he ask that man out of all my classmates? Seriously? She could ask Sydney…or anyone else except him.
"Just let Mr. Ricks accompany you Ms. Lee. Go on…"
I sighed—now annoyed. But arguing with Mrs. Robles will not do me any good. And I'm now really bothering the class…it's embarrassing.
I had no choice but to nod and agree to my professor. I walked out of the classroom and…well, that man followed me. It's really annoying, having him to tag along but I really have no choice but to let him.
As I walked, I held my stomach tightly. I know I said that I'm starting to feel a little bit okay but my stomach is still acting up. And I'm not in a really good mood right now too. I also feel sleepy, so I guess going to the clinic isn't that bad at all…I could really use some sleep right now.
"Are you ok?" I heard Tuff said when we were on our way to the clinic. I flinched when I heard that, but I didn't look back and answer. I haven't forgotten what he said that night a month ago. And I hate him for that…well, for all the things that he had done. He's a jerk and I don't want to be with him. And if it wasn't for Mrs. Robles…I would not even consider going with him.
When we arrived at the clinic Tuff immediately opened the door for me. I rolled my eyes at what he did but I tried to ignore it and went straight inside. We approached the nurse seated on a table near the door. She greeted us with a smile and asked me to fill up a form. After answering it, she then told me to occupy one clinic bed and rest a bit since the school physician is not yet back.
I obliged, and went straight to one of the beds. I walk there without even looking back at Tuff and saying goodbye. As soon as I lie…I immediately closed my eyes. I'll just rest for a bit since I'm really sleepy. My eyes are heavy and my dizziness is still bothering me.
After a couple of minutes, I opened my eyes and frowned when I saw Tuff. He's standing by the door and waiting…but I'm not sure if who or what is he waiting for. I did not even think that he's still here. When I lied on the bed…I thought he'll leave. Does he have no plan on leaving?
I sat up and looked at him. "You can go now!" I said but he just raised his eyebrows.
"Err..." he started but I cut him off.
"I'll call Sydney when I'm done here, so you can go now!" I don't need someone to babysit me…especially him.
He looked at me for a moment but he then nodded afterwards. "O-Okay!" he said. He walks towards the door and opened it but before going out…he threw me a look. He looked at me—just looked at me for about ten seconds before finally walking out. When he finally left, I really felt relieved.
"Ms. Lee!" I raised my head when I heard the school physician call my name. She came near me and smiled to me.
"Good morning doc," I greeted her.
"So, what's the problem?" she asked as she started jotting down on the clipboard she's holding. I hesitated at first. Coming here really scares me especially with the things that's happening to me lately…those fouls smells and throwing up.
"Well…I threw up earlier," I said.
"Okay. Did you eat something bad or something you're not supposed to eat?"
Something I'm not supposed to eat? Well, I don't really have any allergies to some food and I only ate a pancake this breakfast. "I don't think so," I answered. Honestly, I don't think I threw up because of eating something. I got really nauseous earlier and my stomach felt funny…that is why.
"Do you feel anything else?" she asked and this made me hesitate again. Suddenly, I remembered what Racky had told me a couple of days ago. That time when I complained about this foul smell when we're eating at the canteen. I felt scared suddenly—scared about the fact that what she said might be true.
What if I'm really pregnant? The doctor will definitely find this out. No, I'm not yet ready for this.
"Ms. Lee?" she called my attention so I turned to her. I didn't realize that I was so caught up with my thoughts and I already ignored her.
"Y-Yes?"
"I'm asking you if you're feeling anything else."
"Oh! Well..." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I thought for a while as I tried to find the right words to say to her—to make an excuse and lie because I'm really afraid that if I tell her everything that's happening to me…I'll end up regretting it. But I still end up telling her the truth. "I'm dizzy and really sleepy."
She immediately furrowed her forehead when I said that. She wrote something in her clipboard before looking at me with those worried eyes. That made my heart beat in a weird way.
"Are you delicate these past few days?" she inquired and that made me really think.
"Err…I guess so," I replied thinking back to the time where I didn't eat my mom's caldereta because I hate how it smells. She nodded and asked another question.
"Are you always tired?"
"Yes! Maybe it's because of school." I even made sure to add an explanation this time since her questions is now trying to imply something...like this questions is trying to answer only one thing and I don't like it.
"Can you excuse me for a second?" I nodded in response and she approached the nurse who's sitting in the table by the door. They started talking and I even noticed them glancing at me. I sat straight and held my chest tight. I don't know but I'm starting to get nervous.
The doctor tried to smile to me genuinely when she approached me again. But with those smile…I just can't help but get more nervous.
"Ms. Lee, based on the symptoms you've said—I think you're fine, but…" She paused and looked at her hand and that's when I realized that she's holding this small box. Without hesitating, she handed it to me. "Take this test!"
When I looked at the box and read the words written on it…I almost drop it. My eyes widened and my hands started to shake.
Written in blue bold letters are the words "Pregnancy Test Kit".
I started to feel week. Thinking that my worst nightmare is coming true is draining all the energy in my body.
"Doc…" I called. My voice is shaking because of fear.
"Ms. Lee, I know this is hard to take in but we need to know if our suspicion is true."
I lowered my head. We are not yet sure if I'm really pregnant but there's a big possibility that I might be. I can't deny that possibility especially because of what happened to me and Tuff that night. But I can't still accept it if got pregnant because of that mistake. I don't want to be a mother at this age…I'm too young.
I heave a deep breath before I took the pregnancy test kit that she handed.
"There's a comfort room at the end of the hall. Make sure to read the instructions first before doing anything. We'll talk later after we have the results." I nodded and went my way towards the comfort room. But I walked like there are weights that are keeping my feet really heavy. I lose my energy…I felt weak.
When I reached the comfort room…I opened the box and read the instructions. I made sure that I did everything that is instructed to make sure the results will be correct. I waited for a few minutes before looking at it. But before I did that…I summoned all the courage I can have and even prayed a lot of times, maybe wishing that the result will be negative. But I immediately dropped the pregnancy test stick when I saw those two lines there that only imply one thing.
I felt my knees shaking and it didn't take a while for me to fell on the floor. The tears that I've been trying to hide gave way and I started crying.
No! This is not happening! I screamed on my head.
~🌸~